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As for "finding true islam", I don't quite understand what you mean by
true. I feel that I have Allah in my life. I don't think that
there is any way that I could describe to you how horrible my life was just
last year! I had been out on my own since 17, due to a falling out
with my family. Soon after that, I was drinking heavily and doing
drugs. I was sleeping around, using no protection. I stopped
caring. Eventually, I lost my job and my apartment. I was homeless,
sleeping in cars, roaming the streets. I couldn't, wouldn't go home
because of my "pride". Eventually, I got involved
in a relationship that, although gave me a place to stay, turned abusive.
I left that relationship after the first slap, but ended up in another one
that turned out the same, not that he was beating on me, but it was a lot
of mental and verbal abuse. This time I stayed, because I felt that
I had no where else to go.
So I do feel that Allah came into my life, that he set
events into motion to get me out of all that. Things had been bad between
my mother and I since I was 17. Then, all of a sudden, last year things
began to get better between us! Now I'm living at home. I'm out
of that relationship, and I no longer have a stressful job. I work
at home, helping my mom with her daycare, and I enjoy it. I no longer
drink or do drugs. I no longer sleep around.
So I do feel blessed by Allah, I feel that he has come into my life to guide
me and to help me. I don't know if that is "finding true islam" or
not, but I truly do believe that without Allah's guidance, beneficence, and
mercy I would not be at the point in my life where I am today. All
Praises are Due to Allah!
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