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TABLE OF CONTENTS
FOREWORD
CHAPTER ONE
SLOGANS.
CALLS FOR
WOMEN?S LIBERATION
WOMAN?S
EQUALITY WITH MEN
DEMANDS FOR
WOMEN?S RIGHTS
CHAPTER TWO
Women in the
Pre-Islamic Society
Women in the
Indian Society
Women in the
Chinese Society
Women in the
Roman Society
Women in the
Greek Society
Women in the
Old Jewish Society
Women in the
Old Christian Society
CHAPTER THREE
WOMAN?S RIGHTS
IN ISLAM
Daughters in
Islam
ISLAM CARES
FOR WOMAN AS A WIFE
Dowry
Justice,
Fairness and Equality
Expenditure
Spending Night
and Sexual Fulfillment
ISLAM CARES
FOR WOMAN AS A MOTHER
ISLAM CARES
FOR WOMEN IN GENERAL
CHAPTER FOUR
MISCONCEPTION
ABOUT WOMEN IN ISLAM
Polygamy in
Islam
Pagan Arabs
The Main
Conditions for Polygamy in Islam
Justice and Equality
Ability to
Afford Another Household
Western
Thinkers Demand Polygamy
Testimony of
Women
Financial and
Moral Responsibilities of the Household
Childbirth
Child Nursing
Women?s Right
of Inheritance
Blood Money
Women?s Right
to Work
Divorce is not
a likable option in Islam
ISLAM
RECOMMENDED A GUARDIAN FOR WOMAN FOR A CHOICE OF A MAN FOR MARRIAGE
Travel Without
Immediate Male Escort
WOMEN?S
BEATING
CONCLUSION
In the name of Allah, Most gracious Most
merciful
Allah the almighty stated in the glorious
Qur?an 9:71:
The believers, men and women ,
are helpers, supporters, friends and protectors of one another
Islam holds women in great honor and
recognizes their rights in marriage , property and inheritance.
The primary aim of writing this book is to
provide an authentic historical , social and political accounts of women from an
Islamic perspective.
In the light of the glorious Qur?an , Sunnah ?
The sayings of the prophet Mohammad ( may Alla?s peace and blessings be upon
him) and with valid quotations from various sources , I have tried to analyze
the honor bestwood on women in Islam in terms of their rights as daughters ,
sisters , wives and mothers withen the frameworks of enforcement of family life.
I have tried to examine the honorable status
of women in Islam compared to their status in pre-Islamic, Indian, Chinese,
Roman , Greek, The old Jewish and old Christian societies.
I have also, tried to clarify many
misconceptions in the non-Islamic world about women in Islam in terms of
marriage, divorce, houshold responsabilities, work and travel.
In general terms, the first part of surat-Al-
Nisaa (The Women) (4) in the glorius Qura?n , deals with women , orphans,
inheritance, marriage and family rights.
It begins with an appeal to the solidarity of
mankind , the rights of women and orphans, and the implications of family
relationships , including an equitable distriputions of property after death .
I pray to the almighty Allah that to bless my
humble attempt to explain truthfully the justic and honour accorded to women in
Islam. How nicely the Qura?n says in verse 30: 21:
And among his signs is this .
that he created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in
them , and he has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are
indeed signs for people who reflect.
I take this opportunity to thank Mohammad Said
dabbas for translating my book into English , who was assisted in the
translation and editing of the book by Hadi Abu-Gazalh and Mrs. Kawther m. Hall.
Abdulrahman Ibn Abdulkarim AL-Sheeha
Chapter One
It has been recorded in recent history that
many calls have been made for women's rights. Calls for women's freedom,
liberation and equal rights with men have been heard all over the world. Such
calls are acceptable in societies and countries where women are neither given
their due rights, nor are being fairly and justly treated.
It is stunning and surprising, however, to
hear such calls in Islamic societies where women have been fairly treated and
were given their rights more than fourteen hundred years ago, and without any
calls made by them, or rather by their advocates.
Close examination of the slogans announced and
called for by the women's liberation movement shows that they hinge on the
following three elements:
- Calls for women's liberation
- Calls for women's equal rights with men
- Demands for women?s rights
The word ?liberation? indicates, first, that
there are certain shackles, limitations, and bonds, restrictions or chains in
place. Thus, we believe that there are many fallacies or distortions in using
the term ?women's liberation.? The term ?women's liberation? indicates that
women are enslaved, and they must be liberated; that is not the case, indeed.
Absolute liberty is, rather, impossible. Man
is naturally restricted and has many limitations due to his limited abilities
and capabilities. Man, in general, in any given society, primitive or
civilized, lives under certain laws, rules and regulations that normally
govern his life and organize all various affairs of life. Does that mean, by
any standard, that man is not sovereign, independent or free?
Freedom or liberty has, therefore, certain
limits which, if exceeded, will lead to uncivilized activities which do not
abide by any laws, rules, regulations or standards. Islam is the first law, or
system of living, which granted women freedom and liberation. It granted women
the right to deal with the society directly, rather than dealing via a
guardian who is officially responsible and in charge of running all the
woman?s affairs (economically, socially, politically and otherwise).
Islam has forbidden women from being
publicly indecent, sexually provocative and acting as a sex agent, subject or
in any similar form. This is a freedom from which the male in Islam, equally,
as well, has been stripped.
Allah?s Messenger ? peace be upon him (PBUH
) - clearly stated:
The example of a person who
keeps the restricted and imposed laws, restrictions and commands of Allah the
Almighty, and the person who breaks them are examples of two groups of people
who were in a ship and decided to divide it amongst them equally. One group
got the upper deck as their lot, while the other group got the lower part of
the ship. Whenever the people in the lower part of the ship need to get water
they had to pass through the territory of the people on the upper deck (thus
imposing on them and bothering them with their passage). The people in the
lower part thought to themselves ?If we drill a hole in our portion of the
ship, we can have access to the water without disturbing the party on the
upper deck.? If the group on the upper deck let the group on the lower part of
the ship does what tthought was right (drill a hole in the lower part of the
ship to gain access to water), all the people on the ship would be destroyed.
However, if they forbid them from doing so, they would all be safe.
(1)
In fact, Islam illustrates the concept of
freedom and liberty in such a way that individual behavior and conduct must
not, by any m, be either hato the individual himself or destructive to the
society at large.
A well-known German thinker and philosopher,
Schopenhauer said:
Grant woman total and
absolute freedom and liberty for ONE YEAR ONLY, and check with me after that
to see the results of such freedom. Do not forget that you (all), along with
me will inherit virtues, chastity and good morals. If I die (before then) you
are free to say either: s?He was wrong!? or ?He hit the heart of the truth!.
(2)
It is suitable to record here the confession
by an American female reporter who is syndicated in over 250 newspapers,
worked in the area of journalism and broadcasting for over 20 years, and who
has visited numerous Islamic countries, Helesian Stansbery. She said at the
end of one of her visits to an Islamic country:
?The Arab-Islamic society is wholesome and
healthy. This society must continue to protect its traditions that restrict
both its males and females to a certain and reasonable degree. This society
definitely differs from the European and American societies. The Arab-Islamic
society has its own traditions that impose certain restrictions and
limitations on women, respect and obedience to parents, and imposes most
restrictions. First and foremost, the most strict restrictions and limitations
are on absolute sexual freedom that truly threatens both the society and the
family in Europe and the United States of America. Therefore, the restrictions
that are imposed by the Arab-Islamic society are valid and beneficial as well.
I strongly recommend that you adhere to your traditions and code of ethics.
Forbid coeducation. Restrict female freedom, or rather, return back to the
full 'purdah' practices. Truly this is better for you than the sexual freedom
of Europe and the United States of America. Forbid coeducation because we have
suffered from it in the USA. The American society has become sophisticated,
full of all forms and terms of sexual freedom. The victims of sexual freedom
and coeducation are filling the prisons, sidewalks, bars, taverns and whore
houses. The (false) freedom that we have granted to our young females and
daughters has turned them to drugs, crime and white slavery. Coeducation,
sexual freedom and all other types of ?freedom? in the European and American
societies have threatened the family and shaken moral values and ethics.(3)
The question that poses itself here to the
women?s liberation advocates is:
What is the best, most
beneficial and more protecting system for the honor, dignity and pride of
women?
the family and shaken moral values and
ethics.?
Woman?s equality with men is
impossibility. The very nature of men and women is different in terms of
physical, mental and psychological abilities.
If equality between all members of the
same gender is impossible, regardless whether the gender is masculine or
feminine, due to natural differences, it is impossible to be equal between
two genders. This is only natural. Allah Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 51:49:
?And of everything We have
created pairs, that you may remember (the Grace of Allah).?
We shall illustrate throughout this book
and deal with her rights as the following:
- Islam prescribes equal religious duties, requirements
and rituals for both men and women . Prayer (Salat), fasting (Sawm),
charity (Zakat) and pilgrimage (Hajj) are equally required of both
genders. Islam, however, considers woman in some cases by making the
requirements a little lighter on her in terms of religious rules and
regulations, such as dropping both the prayers and the fasting of a
menstruating woman or a woman in the state of after-birth confinement. A
woman is required, however to make up the days of fasting she has missed
due to menses. This has been imposed in such a way only to take the
woman?s health and physical situation into consideration during menses and
confinement periods.
?From the very beginning of creation,
male has been distinguished and differentiated from female. Still, one
completes the other. Based upon this, we believe such a precise division
in terms of the sexes does entail two different missions in life,
otherwise, there would be no need for such differences in the sexes.
Moreover, this indicates that each sex has its own merits, while both are
human beings. We can easily recognize the difference between day and
night, although both help us realize one thing, ?TIME?. The daytime grants
us the ability to seek our daily provision, while the night grants us the
peace to rest. Man and woman, in this aspect of required from men ONLY,
based on his sex. Similarly, there are certain things that are required
from the woman ONLY, based on her natural preparation. Yet, both man and
woman are human beings who share many common characteristics.?
(4)
Allah Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 9:71:
The believers, men and
women, are helpers, supporters, friends and protectors of one another.
They enjoin all that is good, and forbid (people) from all what is evil,
they offer their prayers perfectly, and give the Zakah and obey Allah and
His Messenger. Allah will bestow Mercy on them. Surely Allah is
All-Mighty, All-Wise
- Islam has entitled both males and females to the same
worldly and Hereafter reward and penalty. They both are equal in terms of
reward and punishment as stated in Glorious Quran 16:97:
Whoever does righteous
acts, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer (of
Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world
with respect, contentment and lawful provisions), and We shall pay them
certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they are used to
(i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)
- Islam made both the male and the female equal in terms
of humanity. Islam does not categorize woman as the source of ?Original
Sin? that caused Adam (PBUH) to be dismissed from Jannah (paradise), as
other religious teaching dictate. Allah Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 4:1:
O mankind! Be dutiful to
your Lord, Who created you from a single person (Adam), and from him
(Adam) He created his wife (Eve), and from them both He created many men
and women
Allah the Almighty stated in the
Glorious Quran 75:36-39:
?Does man think that he
will be left neglected without being punished or rewarded for the
obligatory duties enjoined by his Lord (Allah) on him? Was he not a mixed
male and female discharge of semen pouring forth? Then he became a clot;
then (Allah) shaped and fashioned (him) in due proportion, and made him
into two sexes, male and female.?
Allah illustrated in the quoted verses
from Glorious Quran that He created both sexes from one single source.
There is no difference in creation between both sexes. There is no
difference between both sexes in terms of qualifications as well. Both are
very much alike. Thus, Islam canceled and abrogated all previous unfair
and unjust laws and systems against women, especially those which
considered women of inferior quality or nature to that of men.
Consequently, due to these misconceptions, women have been deprived of
many of their human rights. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said, as reported by
Tirmithee:
Women are but (equal)
brethren for men
- ?Islam has entitled women to the same rights insofar as
chastity, integrity and personal honor and respect are concerned. Any
person who falsely accuses any woman with an immoral act or indecshall be
publicly punished, similar to the treatment of man. Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 24:4:
And those who accuse
chaste women, and produce not four witnesses, flog them with eighty
lashes, and reject their testimony forever, they indeed are the liars,
rebellious and disobedient to Allah
- Islam considers women equally qualified insofar as
financial dealings are concerned. Woman, according to Islamic rules,
regulations and teachings, can own, buy, sell and undertake any type of
financialtransaction withoutthe need for guardianship, restrictions or
limitations.
- Islam indicated that who so ever honors, respects and
deals with women with integrity and respect possesses an integral, healthy
and fully composed personality. On the other hand, a man who mistreats
women, insults them, humiliates them or subjects them to unnecessary
humiliation is a mean, dishonest and disrespected man. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
is reported to have said:
Only an honorable man
treats women with honor and integrity. And only a mean, deceitful and
dishonest man humiliates and insults women
(5)
- Islam entitles women to the same rights in terms of
education. Allah?s Messenger tle (PBUH) said, as reported by Baihaqee,
Seeking knowledge is
compulsory for each and every Muslim (i.e., male and female)
Muslim scholars collectively agreed that
the word ?Muslim? includes both male and female, as we indicated between
brackets. Similarly, Islam entitles women to the same equal right to raise
children in the best form, shape and format in accordance with right
Islamic guidance and means of education. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) is
reported to have said,
He who so ever has a
daughter and he does not bury her alive, humiliate [insult or degrade] her
and does not give preference to his son over her, such a person will be
granted entry to Paradise by Allah
(6)
- Islam places woman in an equal position to that of men
in terms of the responsibility of reforming the society in general. , male
and female, man and woman, equally shoulder the responsibility of
enjoining good and forbidding evil in society. Allah the Almighty, stated
in the Glorious Quran 9:71:
The believers, men and
women, are helpers, supporters, friends and protectors of one another,
they enjoin all that is good, and forbid all that is evil, they offer
their prayers perfectly, and give Zakah and obey Allah and His Messenger.
Allah will bestow Mercy on them. Surely Allah is All-Mighty, All-Wise
The core of our discussion in this book
is the demanding of women?s rights. We would like to point out at the very
beginning that there is not a single law, system or regulation that
preserves, maintains and protects woman?s rights as much as Islam does,
whether in the past or in modern times. And this shall be noted in the
following discussions throughout this book.
It is sufficient, we believe, to quote
non-Muslim scholars? statements in this regard;
Sir Hamilton, the well-known English
thinker and philosopher stated in his book Islam and Arab Civilization,
The rules, regulations
and verdicts concerning women in Islam are clear, frank and open. Islam
capitalizes on the complete care that should be given to the protection of
woman against anything that may harm her personally, or causes bad
reputation or character
Gustave Le Bond, the well-known French
thinker stated in his book The Arab Civilization (p.488),
Islamic virtuous deeds
are not limited to honoring and respecting women, but rather, we can add
that Islam is the first religion to honor and respect them. We can easily
prove this by illustrating that all religions and nations, prior to the
advent of Islam, caused much harm and insult to women
He also pointed out (p.497),
Matrimonial rights which
have been stated and illustrated in the Glorious Quran and by the
interpreters of the meanings of the Glorious Quran are far better than
European matrimonial rights for both husband and wife
Over fourteen hundred years ago, Islam
began to spread in the known world following the commission of Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) Mohammad ibin Abdillah, of Makkah. , spread its light
through the teachings that came with the Glorious Quran, and the
traditions of Allah?s Messenger (PBUH). The Islamic teachings made a great
impact, change and influence on the lives of the followers of Islam as a
religion and a way of life. Consequently, these changes affected the
entire societies in which Muslims lived, traveled and settled. The advent
of Islam was different in all aspects. It spread very rapidly in the known
world, and was known, and still is, as the most comprehensive life system.
Islam is found to be exact, accurate and explicit in everyaspect. It
addresses every human need, and does not contradict, clash or reject any
lawful, sound and meaningful requirements of human being's very existence
which are essential to his continuity in life.
We would like to focus here on the
changes that Islam brought in terms of woman and her rights, with which we
are concerned in this book. It is suggested, therefore, that in order to
have a complete, thorough and clear picture about this subject one must
examine, study and explore the status of women prior to the advent of
Islam and further, compare these facts with the changes that occurred
after the application of Islam in the lives of people in the Islamic
society.
Chapter Two
Status of Women throughout
Ages
Prior to the commission of Allah?s
Messenger Mohmmad ibn Abdullah (PBUH) as a Prophet and Messenger,
women suffered great injustice, unfair treatment and were exposed to
humiliation of all kinds. Women were not entitled to inherit from
their parents, husband or other relatives because Arabs believed
inheritance should only be granted to those who could ride a horse,
fight, gain war booties and help protect the tribe and territory. In
fact, more humiliation was even applied to women, in that she herself
could be Women were treated like material items of this world. If a
woman?s deceased husband had adult sons from other marriages, the
oldest son amongst them had the right to add the wife of his deceased
father to his household, exactly as such a son inherits the wealth of
his deceased father. This widow, the wife of the deceased, was unable
to leave the house of her stepson unless she paid a ransom for her
life and liberation.
Women, also were forbidden to
remarry if a husband divorced them. Women had no right then to choose,
or even consent, to their marriage. Man, on the other hand, had the
freedom to acquire as many wives as so desired, with no set limit.
Moreover, there was no justice system that may forbid a man from
practicing anything unjust or unfair to his wives.
Arabs, during the pre-Islamic era,
never liked or welcomed the birth of a female baby into their family.
They hated such a birth, and considered it an evil and bad omen. A
father who received the news of the birth of a female baby was usually
extremely sad, disappointed and depressed. Allah the Almighty,
described the father?s situation when receiving the news about the
birth of a daughter in the family in the pre-Islamic era:
When the news of
(the birth of) a female (baby) is brought to any of them, his face
becomes dark, and he is filled with inward grief! He hides himself
from the people because of the evil of that whereof he has been
informed. Shall he keep her with dishonor or bury her in the Earth?
Certainly, evil is thdecision
(7)
Women even were not able to practice
some natural rights, such as eating certain types of foods for
instance. Some specific types of food were allowed only for males.
Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran 6:139:
And they say: ?What
is in the bellies of such cattle (milk or fetus) is for the male
alone, and forbidden from our females (girls and women), however, if
it was born dead, then all have shares therein
In fact, the hatred of female baby
girls reached the extent of burying them alive at a very early age.
Some Arab tribes were well known for burying their newborn girls alive
at a very early age. The reasons for burial of young females alive
varied, however, according to the social status of the family. Some
families, or ratherthe head of the family, the fathe, buried their
daughters at a very early age fearing a shame that girls may bring to
the family (if they are indulged in any shameful practices, i.e.
adultery or fornication or even prostitution). Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 81:8-9 with reference to the Day of
Judgment:
And when the female
(infant) buried alive [as the pagan Arabs used to do] shall be
questioned; for what sin she was killed?
Other fathers used to bury alive
their female child at a very early age if the child was leprous, lame
or had any other major handicap or birth defect. Those were the poor
Arab pagans. Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran 17:31,
And kill not your
children for fear of poverty. We provide for them and you. Surely, the
killing of them is a great sin
The only thing women could be proud
of during the pre-Islamic era was the protection of the man and his
revenge against others who humiliate or dishonor her in an attempt to
maintain her dignity and honor in the tribe.
Women were treated as maids or
slave-girls in the Indian society. Women had no will or desire of
their own.
(8)
They followed their husbands fully with no questions asked. Women
were easily lost in a gambling game played by the husband.
(9)
They were never allowed to remarry after the death of their
husbands. In fact, women were not even entitled to live after the
death of their husbands as both usually were burned in the same
funeral pyre.
(10)
The widow had to be buried on the same day of the death of her
husband.
(11)
This practice lasted until the end
of the 17th century when this custom was outlawed in spite of the
dismay caused to the Hindu religious leaders. In fact, in certain
areas of India, women were brought as a sacrifice to the Hindu gods
in order to please them or to seek the fall of rain from heaven.
Some Hindu laws declare that;
The predestined
patience, the blowing wind or tornadoes, death, hellfire, poison,
snakes and fire are no less worse than women (the female)
(12)
It is also stated in Hindu
religious books,
(13)
that ?When Manna (the Hindu god of creation) created women he
imposed onto them the love of bed, seats, decoration [make-up],
filthy lust (of all types and kinds), anger, rebellion against honor
and dignity and evil attitude, behavior and conduct.?
(14)
In the teachings of Manna Herma Sistra
(15)concerning
women, one can read:
A woman may live
without any choice regardless of whether she is a little girl, a
young lady or a mature woman. A young girl is under the command and
choice of her father. A married woman is under the command and
choice of her husband. A widow is under the command and choice of
her male children, and she may never become independent (after the
death of her husband). A widow may never remarry after the death of
her husband, but rather she must neglect all that she likes in terms
of food, clothes, and makeup until she dies. A woman may not
actually own, or possess anything, as whatever she may gain or
acquire shall go straight and immediately to the ownership of her
husband(16)
In fact, in some, maybe rare cases
a woman may have several husbands at the same time.
(17)This
made her look like a prostitute in the society.
Women in the Chinese society
occupied a very low place. She used to be assigned the most
despised and least important jobs and positions. The male child,
however, was treated and looked upon as a ?gift? from God. As for
the female child, nobody cared for her, but rather they would be
pleased to see her die. A Chinese proverb says: ?Listen to your
wife, but never believe what she says.?
(18)Therefore,
we notice that the status of women in the Chinese society was not
much better than that of the pagan Arab pre-Islamic society.
The woman in the Roman society
was looked upon as a minor who could not run her own affairs.
Men directed all of women?s affairs. All authorities were in the
hands of men. Men enjoyed full rights over their family?s
affairs. Men had the authority to sentence their wives to death
in certain cases in which a woman was accused with certain
crimes.(19)
Similarly, men, as
fathers, had the authority to run their daughters-in-law?s
affairs (the wives of their sons and grandsons). The authority
of man over woman in the Roman society included, but not limited
to the following: Selling the woman, torturing her, sending her
into exile or killing her. The woman in the Roman society had to
listen, obey and execute fully what the man says or judges.
Women were deprived of the right of inheritance. In the
meanwhile, the heir of the deceased father was his eldest son.
In fact, Roman society permitted the man to add to the family
members any person who might not belong to that specific family.
Similarly, men had the right to kick out or sell any member of
the family.
(20)
Women in the Greek society
did not enjoy any better status.
(21)Women
were deprived of the right to education. In fact, women were
very discerned in the Greek society to the extent that man
claimed that ?Women are nothing but all evil.?
(22)There
was no system to protect women in this society. Women were
sold and bought like any other commodity. Women were deprived
of the right of inheritance as well. Moreover, women in this
society were considered minors who had no right to make any
transaction with their own wealth. Women, throughout their
lives, were subjected to the will of men. Women had no right
to seek divorce. Divorce was an absolute right of man that led
some Greek thinkers to say, ?Women?s name must be locked up in
the house, as it is the case with her body.?
(23)
Women in the Greek society
therefore were in the lowest position.
Gustave Le Bond, the French
thinker, stated in his book Arab Civilization
(24)
?Greeks, in general,
considered women as the lowest creatures of the low. They were
useful for nothing other than reproduction and taking care of
the household affairs. If a woman gave birth to an ?ugly,
retarded or handicapped? child, the man could take the liberty
to kill the (unwanted or undesirable) child.?
Demosthenes, the well-known
Greek speaker and thinker even said:
We, Greek
men, enjoyed the company of prostitutes for sexual pleasure,
?girl-friends?, sweet-hearts, to care for our daily needs and
we marry to get ?legitimate? children
(25)
So, we can see what fortune
women had in such a society based on the statement issued by
one of their best and well-known thinkers!
Women in the old Jewish
society were not more fortunate than those previously
described. In the Old Testament 7:25-26 women were described
as follows:
Both my
heart and Isearched and sought wisdom and goojudgment, to
know that evil (acts) are nothing but ignorance,and
stupidity, foolishness and madness. I found that more better
than death is a woman as she is a net, her heart is a trap,
and her hands are shackles (or handcuffs)
(26)
In the book of Exodus
21:7-11:
And if a
man sells his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go
out as the menservants do. 8. If she pleases not her master,
who has betrothed her to himself, then shall he let her be
redeemed: to sell her unto a strange nation he shall have no
power, seeing he has dealt deceitfully with her. 9. And if
he had betrothed her unto his son, he shall deal with her
after the manner of daughters. 10. If he take him another
wife, her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall
he not diminish. 11. If he does not do these three unto her,
then shall she go out free without money
Thus, if a Jewish woman
got married, her guardianship was transferred from her
father to her husband and she became as one of his
possessions such as his house, his slave, his maidservant or
his money or wealth.
This is also understood
from Exodus 20:17:
Thou shalt
not covet thy neighbor?s house, thou shalt not covet thy
neighbor?s wife, nor his manservant, nor his ox, nor his
ass, nor anything that is thy neighbor?s
In addition, the Jewish
teachings and laws deprived the girl from her father?s
inheritance if the father had other male children. In the
Old Testament, the book of Numbers 27:8:
And thou
shalt speak unto the children of Israel ?If a man dies, and
has no son, then ye shall cause his inheritance to pass unto
his daughters
Moreover, Jewish men never
slept in the same bed with a menstruating woman, eat with
her or drink with her. Jewish men used to isolate themselves
fully from a menstruating woman until she is completely free
from menses.
Christian priests went
to the extreme considering the woman as the cause of
?original sin? and the source of all catastrophes from
which the entire world suffered. For this very reason, the
physical relationship between man and woman labeled as
?filthy? or ?dirty?, even if it was officially done and
performed within a legitimate marriage contract.
Saint Trotolian says:
?Woman is the Satan?s
pathway to a man?s heart. Woman pushes man to the ?Cursed
Tree.? Woman violates God?s laws and distorts His picture
(i.e. man?s laws and picture).?
Wieth Knudesen, a Danish
writer, illustrated the woman?s status in the middle ages
saying,
According to the Catholic faith, which considered the
woman as a second class citizen, very little care and
attention was given to her
In 1586, there was a
conference held in France to decide whether woman was to
be considered a human being or not! After lengthy
discussions, the people who attended the conference came
to a conclusion that: ?Woman is a human being, but she is
created to serve man.? Thus, the conference approved the
rights for women as human being, a matter that was in
doubt and undecided! Moreover, those who attended the
conference did not decide on full rights for the woman,
but rather she was a follower of the man and a maidservant
to him with no personal rights. This decision was in
effect until 1938, where, for the first time, a decree was
issued to abrogate all the laws that forbid a woman to
conduct her own financial affairs directly and open a bank
account in her own name. In England, women remained until
1850 with no citizen-status having no personal rights
until 1964 when a decree from Oxford University was issued
to declare equality between male and female students.
Europeans continued to
discern women and deprive them their rights throughout the
entire Middle Ages. It is also surprising to know that
English laws permitted the man to sell his wife. The rift
between the sexes, men and women, continued to increase,
so much so, that women became fully under the control of
man. Women were stripped completely of all rights and
whatever they owned. All that a woman owned belonged to
her husband. For instance, until very recently, women,
according to the French law, are not considered capable of
making their own financial decisions in their private
ownership. We can read article 217 of the French laws that
states:
A
married woman has no right to grant, transfer, bond, own
with or without payment, without her husband?s
participation in the sale contract, or his written consent
to it, regardless whether the marriage contract stipulated
that there should be a complete separation between the
husband?s and wife?s possessions and ownership?s of
various items
Despite all amendments
and modifications occurred onto these French laws, we can
still see how these laws are affecting the married French
woman. It is a form of civilized slavery.
Furthermore, a married
woman loses her surname (family?s name) as soon as she
enters into a marriage contract. A married woman shall
carry the family name of her husband?s. This, of course,
indicates that a married woman will be only a follower of
her husband and she will loose even her personal identity.
Bernard Shaw, the
well-known English writer says:
The
moment a woman marries, all her personal possessions
become her husband?s in accordance to the English laws
Lastly, there is one
more injustice that has been imposed upon the woman in
Western society which is that a marriage bond is made to
last forever, in accordance with the legal and religious
teachings. There is no right for divorce (according to
Catholicism, at least). Husband and wife are physically
only separated from each other. This separation may have
contributed to all sorts of social decay and corruption,
such as having affairs, mistresses, boyfriends,
girlfriends, as well as possibly prostitution, homosexual
and lesbian relations.
Moreover, a surviving
widow is not given the chance to remarry and lead a normal
married life after the death of her husband.
For all these reasons
collectively, the status of women became very negligent in
the "modern" Western society. This led, at a later stage,
to the movement in favor of women in the society led by
the Western thinkers, lobbyists, human rights activists
and educators. These "thinkers" demanded absolute equal
rights, socially and otherwise, for women in the society.
Chapter
Three
Let us here address
the status of women in Islam after the quick summary of
the status of women in the pre-Islamic societies. We
need here to compare the rights to which Islam has
entitled women and the rights that other societies
granted.
Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 17:31 concerning the
necessity and importance of the preservation and care
of female and male newborns:
And
kill not your children for fear of poverty. We provide
for them and for you. Surely, such a killing is a
great sin
In fact, Islam
declares that the killing of children is a great sin
which is punishable by Allah.
Islam prescribes the
parents to give their children beautiful names, take
proper care of them, take care of all their needs,
provide for them what they need, in accordance to
parent?s level of income, and ensure a decent,
respected and honorable life for them. Islam imposes
this as a child?s right. Allah the Almighty, stated in
the Glorious Quran 2:233:
Mothers shall nurse their children for two whole
years, for those parents who desire to complete the
term of suckling, and the father of the child shall
bear the cost of the mother?s food and clothing ona
reasonable basis
Nursing and child
up-bringing is the most important right after the
right of fostering by the mother. The mother is
entitled to the upbringing of the child, son or
daughter, at the early stage of life, between the ages
of one and thirteen or fourteen. This appparticularly
in case of divorce due to justified differbetween
parents. Islam entitles the mother custody during
early childhood because she, generally, is more caring
and attentive of the child?s need. ?Amr bin Shu?aib
related to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said that: ?A
woman came to the Prophet (PBUH) complaining about her
husband by saying, ?My belly (womb) held my baby as a
fetus, my breast nursed the baby as an infant and my
lap carried the baby for a long time. The baby?s
father divorced me, and he wants to strip the baby (my
child) away from me!? The prophete (PBUH)
said ?You deserve the child?s
custody as long as you do not remarry.?
(27)
Abu-Bakr (RAA), the first rightly guided Caliph of
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), passed a verdict in favor of
?Asim?s mother, the wife of Omar bin al-Khattab (RAA),
when Omar divorced her. Abu-Bakr (PBUH), said:
Her
smell, the way the mother smells her child, and her
kindness is better for him than you
(28)
If it was not for
the commands of Allah the Almighty, stated in the
Glorious Quran, and the teaching of Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) in the Sunnah, women would not have been given
the preference over men. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) was
reported as saying,
Be
fair and just in terms of the gifts you offer your
children. If I was to give preference to any (gender
over the other) I would have preferred females over
males (in terms of gifts)
(29)
Moreover, Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) concentrated throughout his teachings
on giving more care and attention to females in
general over the male. Females must be treated with
kindness, respect, honor, dignity, integrity and their
needs must be looked after. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
says:
Whom-so-ever has three daughters, or three sisters, or
two daughters or two sisters, and is very kind and
nice to them, and fears Allah in their treatment, will
enter Paradise (as a result of his good actions for
these females)
(30)
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
is also reported to have said:
Whom
? so - ever has three daughters and exercises patience
with them, feeds them, clothes them according to his
own income, they will become like a barrier for him,
to protect him from the torture of the Hellfire
(31)
Islamic laws and
teachings mandate that parents raise their children in
the best manners and offer them a sound, beneficial
and healthy education. Ibn Omar (RAA), reported
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) as saying, ?The most sinful
of you are those who neglect those whom he is
responsible to take care of.?
(32)
Ibn Omar (RAA),
reported Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) as saying said:
Each
one of you (Muslims) is a shepherd (i.e. care taker).
And each one of you is responsible for his own herd
(i.e. whatever one is entrusted with). A leader, is a
shepherd, and is responsible for his own herd. A man
is a shepherd of his family, and he is responsible for
his own herd. A woman is a shepherd in her husband?s
home, and she is responsible for his herd. A servant
is a shepherd in his master?s wealth, and he is
responsible for his herd. Each one of you (Muslims) is
a shepherd and each one of you is responsible for his
own herd
(33)
Additionally, Islam
commanded that justice in its broad concept is applied
amongst all children regardless of their sexes. Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran 16:90:
Verily Allah enjoins justice and doing of good, and
liberality to kith and kin, and He forbids all
shameful deeds, injustice and rebellion. He admonishes
you, that you may take heed
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
also said:
Be
just and fair to your children; be just and fair to
your children; be just and fair to your children,
(three times)
(34)
Bukhari also
reported that ??Aishah, the mother of the believers (RAA),
said to the prophet ?A poor woman came to my door
carrying two little girls. I offered the woman (3)
three dates. She gave each of her two girls a date,
and lifted the third one to her mouth to eat. Both her
daughters asked her to feed them. The woman split the
last date into two pieces and gave one half to each of
her two daughters.? I admired what the woman had done
and reported it to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), who said
upon hearing it:
Verily, Allah made paradise, a permanent abode for
that woman for what she did in terms of sacrifice, and
He has liberated her from the hellfire
(35)
Undoubtedly, this
noble direction of Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) ties
together human emotions; i.e., the natural love of
children, and the reward in the hereafter. The love of
the hereafter is but an incentive for parents to be
kind, merciful and just to all their children. Parents
will pray for the reward from Allah.
Islam calls for
material and emotional justice and fair treatment from
both parents to their children, regardless of their
sexes. A male child is not to be given preference over
a female child, and vise versa. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
once was asked by a man to give him testimony that he
gave his son a certain gift. Upon that, Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) asked the father: ?Did you give all
your children the same as you gave this son?? The man
answered negatively. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said:
Let
someone else be a witness. I will not bear witness to
an unfair and unjust thing. (O People!) Fear Your
Lord, Allah, and be just amongst all your children
(36)
Islam did not limit
justice and fair treatment to visible matters only.
This treatment was passed on to all details of the
life, including, but not limited to emotional acts
such as kissing a child or smiling for him. Anas (RAA),
reported that a man was sitting with Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH). A son of that man came to see him. The man
kissed his son and let him sit on his lap (thigh). (A
little later), a daughter of that man came (to see her
father). He made her sit in front of him. Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) said to the man: ?Why do you not
equalize (in treatment) between both of your
children??
(37)
It is worth
mentioning here, also, that Islam emphasized the
importance of taking care of the orphans. Being an
orphan has a great negative impact on the mental,
spiritual and emotional status of a child. This state
may lead an orphan to deviation or corruption at
times, especially if the orphan exists in a society
that does not give him due care, fulfill his needs and
be kind and merciful to him.
Islam pays special
attention, and gives tremendous care, to orphans,
males and females. Islam required that the immediate
relatives of that orphan take good care of him/her. If
there are no relatives, then it becomes the
responsibility of the Islamic State to take care of
them, manage their affairs and provide them with care.
Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran 93:9,
Therefore, treat not the orphan with oppression
Allah the Almighty,
also stated in the Glorious Quran 4:10:
Verily, those who unjustly eat up the property of
orphans, they eat up only a fire into their bellies,
and they will be burnt in the Blazing fire!? Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) is also reported to have said: ?O
Allah! I declare it a great sin to harm, do injustice,
hurt or waste the rights of the two weak persons, the
orphan and the woman
(38)
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
is also reported to have said:
Avoid the seven cardinal sins that may cause
destruction. The companions asked: ?O Prophet of
Allah! What are these sins?? He (PBUH) said: ?To
associate others in the worship of Allah, to practice
sorcery, to kill a human soul for no due reason, to
deal with Riba (usury), toeat up the wealth of an
orphan, to back away in the battle field and to accuse
the innocent, chaste, women with adultery
(39)
On the other hand,
many other statements of Allah?s Messenger(PBUH) have
been reported as urging believing Muslims to sponsor
orphans, take good care of them, be kind to them and
demonstrate love and affection to them. He (PBUH)
said: ?I and the sponsor of an orphan are like these
two fingers in Jannah. (He (PBUH) pointed out to both
index and middle fingers).? He (PBUH)
(40)
also said: ?Whosoever places his
hand over the head of an orphan with mercy and
affection, Allah will record the good deed for this
person according to the number of hairs that the
person?s hand wipes of the orphan?s head.?
(41)
Islam also paid
special attention to foundlings or illegitimate
children who are left without any indication to
acknowledge their parents, whether it is a male or a
female. The Islamic government is required to take
care of such children exactly as an orphan. Two good
members, a well taken care of orphan and foundling
will be brought up in a decent manner so as they may
become normal and beneficial members of the society.
Thus, these two members of the society may assume
their normal life responsibilities rather than being a
burden or curse on the society should they be left
without care and affection.
Islam values the
opinion of the daughter when it comes to marriage.
Moreover, Islam considered the opinion of the daughter
in the marriage as an essential condition for the
validity of the marriage itself. The daughter, the
sister, the granddaughter, or the female in general,
is free to accept the person who seeks marriage from
her, or reject his proposal. The father, or any other
guardian, has no right to force her to accept a person
whom she does not want. Allah?s Messenger(PBUH) said:
A
virgin girl must not enter wedlock until she gives
permission to do so. And a divorcee, or widow, should
be also asked to give approval of the proposing man
(42)
Imam Ahmad also
reported ?Aishah (RAA), as saying ?A woman came to
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) and said, ?O Prophet of
Allah! My father offered me as wife to his nephew (who
was an honorable man with a good social status in the
society, while we were normal people with no
recognition) so as to elevate his social status. What
should I do?? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said, ?The
matter is in your hands. If you like you may accept
and approve the marriage. If you do not, no one has
the right to force you to accept it.? The woman said,
?I approve what my father had done, but I want to
teach other women that their fathers have no right to
force them to marry whom -ever their fathers want.?
Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 30:21:
Among His signs is this, that He created for you wives
from among yourselves, that you may find repose in
them, and He has put between you affection and mercy
We notice that it is
one of the great signs of the Might of Allah the
Almighty, is to create for mankind wives from among
themselves so that they are comforted, settled, and
can derive satisfaction from one another. They, both
male and female, derive comfort, satisfaction, help
and assistance from each other and support one
another.
A wife, according to
Islam, is one of the most essential pillars and the
foundation of the entire society. She is the basic
foundation upon which a Muslim home is established.
Islam grants her certain rights and requires her to
perform certain duties as we shall illustrate in the
following section.
Dowry, is a right
of every bride prior to marriage. This is a gift
that has been specified and mandated by the Islamic
teachings. A marriage contract is not complete
unless and until a dowry has been approved. Dowry
cannot be dropped or forfeited, even if the bride
approves, until the marriage contract is completed.
The woman entering marriage has the freedom to do
whatever she wants with what she owns after the
marriage contract is fulfilled. Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 4:4:
Give the women whom you marry their dower
(obligatory bridal money given by the husband at the
tie of marriage) with a good heart, but if they, of
their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to
you, take it, and enjoy it without fear of any harm
(as Allah had made it lawful)
Dowry is one of
the woman?s rights. A husband may not, and is not
allowed to take anything back of the dower that he
has given to his wife if he decides to divorce her
and seek another marriage. Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 4:20-21:
If
you intend to replace a wife by another and you have
given one of them a ?Qintar? (approx. 100 kg of
gold) as dowry, take not the least of it back; would
you take it wrongfully without a right and with a
manifest sin. And how can you take it back while you
have gone in unto each other, and they have taken
from you a firm and strong covenant?
Allah the
Almighty, also stated in the Glorious Quran 4:19:
O
you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women
against their will, and you should not treat them
with harshness, that you may take away part of their
dowry you have given them, unless they commit open
illegal sexual intercourse. Live with them
honorably; if you dislike them, it may be that you
dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great
deal of good.
This verse ensures
the wife?s rights as illustrated by Allah the
Almighty, as stated in the Glorious Quran.
It is forbidden
and unlawful to inherit women against their will. We
have illustrated earlier that Arabs during the
pre-Islamic era used to inherit the woman herself.
If a husband, who had grown up children who are
capable of marrying, died; his widow was inherited
by the elder son from another marriage; or else,
that heir may offer that widow of his deceased
father to any other man. Or, the stepson; i.e., the
heir, used to forbid the widow of his father to
marry someone else. This practice that rendered the
widow as a commodity in the hand of the stepson or
heir, entitled the man to do as he wishes with her.
Allah the
Almighty, illustrated in the Glorious Quran that it
is unlawful for a man to mistreat his wife in such a
fashion that imposes hardship, harassment and burden
to her. Such as insulting her, beating her, wasting
her wealth and funds or even forbidding her from
going out of her house, in an attempt to force her
to pay all she possesses as ransom to her husband to
release her in divorce.
Islamic laws and
teachings, however, permit the husband to impose
hardship onto any woman who displays distorted moral
conduct that is shameful and harmful to the entire
society and may cause decay to the social order. A
woman who fornicates, for instance, or commits
adultery, may be treated harshly so that the man may
demand return of the dowry that he gave her when he
married her. Afterwards, such a woman may be offered
divorce.
Allah the
Almighty, commanded in the Glorious Quran that a
husband must live with his wife honorably, kindly
and with respect. A man must say and do nice things
to his wife. A man must wear decent, clean and
acceptable clothes when he sits in his household. A
man must look in his best as he likes his wife to do
for him at home, because this is only human nature.
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) is reported to have said:
The most believing of you are those who possess best
morals. The best of men are those best to their
wives.
(43)
Allah?s
Messenger(PBUH) is reported to have been always
pleasant, kind and caring to all. He played and
joked nicely and politely with his family members.
He was also known to be very kind and good to them.
Imam Ahmad reported Allah?s Messenger(PBUH) as
saying,
All things man may play with and have fun are none
beneficial and involve waste of time except three
items as fol: to practice archery, to train one?s
horse and to play and have decent fun with one?swife.
These three items are lawful and truthful ones.
(44)
Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) spent generously on his family members as he
could financially afford. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
also is well known for being cheerful and decent in
joking with his household and playing with them.
?Aishah (PBUH), the mother of the believers, is
reported to have said, ?Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
raced with me and I beat him before I become old and
heavy. Later, when I became old and heavy he raced
with me again and he won. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
said to me upon winning the race, ?This win of mine
makes up for that win of yours.?
(45)
Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) is reported to have a habit of sitting in the
house for a short while with his family, talking to
them, giving them company and showing kindness,
before going to sleep, and after offering the late
evening prayer, i.e. Isha. Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 33:21:
?Indeed in the person of the Messenger of Allah
there is a good example to follow for those who
believe in Allah and the hereafter, and remembers
Allah much.? Hence, Allah?s Messenger(PBUH) is the
best example to follow for all of us, the believing
Muslims. Muslims ought to follow the pattern of
Allah?s Messenger(PBUH) in all of their personal and
public affairs throughout their entire life.?
This practice
applies to husbands who are married to more than
one wife. A husband who has a plural marriage in
accordance to Islam must be fair and just to all
of his wives and treat them on equal terms with
regards to feeding, clothing and time-sharing.
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) is reported to have said:
He who has two wives and does not demonstrate
justice, fairness and equality amongst them will
come on the Day of Resurrection with one of his
sides paralyzed
(46)
A husband must
spend enough of his income and wealth for his
wife. He is required to secure suitable housing,
daily needs in terms of food, clothing and
whatever other necessities the house may
require. Allah the Almighty, stated in the
Glorious Quran 65:7:
Let the rich man
spend according to his means, and let the man
whose resources are restricted, spend according
to what Allah has given him. Allah puts no
burden on any person beyond what He has given
him. Allah will grant after hardship, ease
Hakeem bin
Mu?awiyeh al-Qushairee reported his father as
saying:
?I asked Allah?s
Messenger ?what is the right of one?s wife onto
him?? He answered, ?Her right is to feed her as
you feed yourself, to clothe her as you clothe
yourself; do not hit her at the face, do not use
insulting language, and do not abandon her bed
for any place other than home
(47)
Therefore, if
a rich man fails to spend on his family in
accordance with his means, and the wife is able
to take a portion of his wealth, even without
informing him and making it clear to him, she
may take a sum that could satisfy only the
essential needs of her and her children, without
exaggeration or overspending. This ruling is
based upon the incident of Lady Hind bint ?Utbah
who came to Allah?s Messenger complaining about
her husband, Abu-Sofyan, saying, ?My husband is
a miser and he does not spend enough on me and
his children.' Allah?s Messenger said:
Take whatever
suffices you and your children modestly
(48)
If a husband
came under heavy financial strain and was
incapable of fulfilling his family?s financial
needs, or if he left his wife for an extensive
period of time whereby the wife was hurt due to
that absence, the wife is entitled to seek court
intervention to break that marriage. This is
based on a Hadith reported by Abu-Hurairah (RAA),
as ?Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) was once asked
about a husband who does not have sufficient
funds to satisfy the living needs of his wife,
what should be done about such a marriage??
Allah's Messenger said,
This marriage
should be broken by the separation of the
husband and his wife
(49)
This setuation
and judgement exist only if the wife brought the
case to the court asking for her exbenditure or
seperation.
Islam urges
men to treat their wives kindly and with a
caring and sharing attitude. The Messenger of
Allah was reported as saying,
?The most
complete believers in terms of faith are those
who possess the best morals. The best of you are
those best to their wives.?
Islam did not
neglect the mental and emotional rights of women
as well. There are many rights in addition to
the materialistic rights for women. The
following are some of these mental and emotional
rights for women:
- Women must be protected by
man from all immoral people. They should not
be exposed to places of moral corruption,
nightclubs and other similar places.
- Allah the Almighty, stated
in the Glorious Quran 66:6:
O you who
believe! Ward off from yourselves and your
families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is people
and stones, over which are appointed angels,
stern and severe, who disobey not the commands
they receive from Allah, and do what they are
commanded
(50)
- Women should be taught
beneficial things for both this world and the
hereafter. All their secrets must be kept and
preserved. None of their shortcomings should
be disclosed to anyone. No private affairs of
the woman should be made public or shared as a
conversation item even among the most intimate
friends. None of the practices a husband does
privately with his spouse should be disclosed
openly or secretly to anyone, regardless of
how close he might be. Allah?s Messenger was
reported as saying:
?One of the
worst people in the sight of Allah on the Day
of Resurrection is a husband who may do
private things with his wife, or a wife who
does the same with her husband, then one of
them discloses that privacy to others.?
This right
is one of the most emphasized rights in
Islam. The husband is required and obliged
by Islamic law to fulfill the sexual rights
of his spouse, to ensure the satisfaction of
the spouse so as to refrain one's spouse
from getting involved in shameful acts, may
Allah forbid. A spouse, as any other female,
is in a great need for a big heart to love
her, care for her, fulfill her natural and
physical needs and take care of her
instinctive demands.
Islam, in
fact, forbids husbands from indulging
themselves in matters of physical devotions,
like prayers and fasting, in a way that may
detract them from attending to their
partners' needs, demands and instinctive
requirements. Salman Al-Farisi (RAA),
reported, ?I went to visit my brother in
faith, Abu-Darda (RAA), upon arrival, I was
greeted by his spouse who was wearing very
casual house clothes. Seeing that, I asked
her, ?What is the matter with you; why are
you wearing such simple and casual clothes
and not wearing other suitable clothes to
please your husband?? She said, ?Your
brother, Abu-Darda (RAA), has no interest,
none whatsoever, with this world and its
affairs. He spends his nights praying and
spends the day fasting!? Upon the arrival of
Abu-Darda (RAA), who welcomed Salman (RAA),
and offered him some food, Salman said, ?Why
don?t you eat with me?? Abu-Darda (RAA),
said ?I am fasting.? Salman (RAA), said ?I
take an oath by Allah that you must break
your fast and eat with me?. Abu-Darda (RAA),
broke his fast and ate Salman (RAA). Salman
spent that night with Abu-Darda (RAA). The
latter got up during the night to offer some
night prayers. Salman (RAA), stopped him
from doing so by saying ?Your body certain
rights upon you; your Lord has certain
rights upon you; and your family has
certarights upon you. Fast some days, and
break the fast on others, approach your
spouse and fulfill her instinctive needs.
Grant every person his due right.? At the
break of dawn, Salman (RAA), permitted Abu-Darda
(RAA), to get up and offer prayers. Both of
them got up, performed ablution and offered
some prayers then they headed to the Masjid
to offer Fajr prayer. Upon finishing the
prayer with Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), Abu-Darda
(RAA), reported to the Prophet (PBUH) what
Salman (RAA), had said and done to him. The
Messenger of Allah (PBUH) confirmed, ?Salman
said the truth.?
(51)
The
following are some other rights that the
spouse enjoys according to Islam:
A husband must not travel
and be away from home for more than a
six-month period at one time ( if his wife
agree , and this is an estmated period set by
the prophet?s khalif Omar Ibn AL-Khattab (RAA)
after he consulted his doughter Hafsa (RAA)
about the period that the wife can stay away
from her husband, but, this period remains
less or more, debens on the wife?s sextual
demands). A wife, based on her own instinctive
nature, may tolerate the absence of her
husband for more than six months, or she may
demand him to come back before that time. The
husband may not refuse or deny his spouse?s
request unless he has a very valid and
legitimate excuse.
A husband must not make any
financial decisions on behalf of his spouse
and must not interfere in her own financial
affairs unless she gives him such permission.
The husband has no right to take any of his
spouse?s financial assets without her
knowledge and approval.
The husband must consult
his spouse in ?so -far as the major household
decisions, children?s affairs and other mutual
affairs. It is not wise to dictate a man?s
opinion upon all members of the family and not
listen to the spouse?s opinion, as long as her
opinion is wise and correct. Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) gave us a practical example of such
doing. On the Day of the Pact.
(52)
the Prophet (PBUH) commanded his companions to
shave their heads and take off their Hajj/Umra
garments clothes, ?Ihram?, but they were slow
and did not hasten to fulfill his command.
Ummu Salamah (RAA), his wife, recommended that
he do so himself and goes out before his
companions. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) acted
upon the recommendation of his wife, doing
what she suggested and went out of his tent.
When the companions saw Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
and what he had done, they all hastened to
emulate his act.
A husband must avoid
tracing and counting every innocent mistake
his spouse may commit. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
is reported to have said, ?A husband may not
come late at night from a travel to his home
without a proper notification.
(53)
A husband may find his spouse in an unprepared
situation that he may dislike, and thus this
may cause him to dislike his spouse.
A husband must be kind,
attentive, sharing and caring to his spouse.
He must deal with her with honesty, decency,
patience and care and must take into
consideration her very human nature; women
like to be loved tenderly and be well taken
care of. A husband must demonstrate his
affection, love, appreciation, caring,
consideration and genuine keenness to his
spouse. This must be expressed with words and
actions. Allah the Almighty, stated in the
Glorious Quran 4:19:
O you who
believe! You are forbidden to inherit women
against their will, and you should not treat
them with harshness, that you may take away
part of the dower you have given them, except
where they have been guilty of illegal sexual
intercourse. And live with them honorably. If
you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a
thing and Allah brings through it a great deal
of good
It is also
reported that Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said:
A believing
Muslim must not declare his dislike of a
believing spouse. A husband may dislike some
of his spouse?s behaviors, but he will
definitely like others
(54)
We note
that the Glorious Quran greatly emphasized
the right of the woman as a mother. In fact,
Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 17:23:
Your Lord has
decreed that you worship none but Him; and
that you be dutiful, kind, and caring to
your parents. If one of them or both attains
old age in your life, say not to them a word
of faintest complaint or disrespect, nor
shout at them; but address them in terms of
honor
Allah, in
this verse puts His right to be worshipped
along with the right of parents, in the same
address and at the same level. This displays
the great rights and position of parents in
Islam.
Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) declared that: ?Paradise is
under the mother?s feet.
(55)
No doubt this is a
symbolic representation of the fact that the
pleasure, caring, respecting and serving the
mother will definitely lead man to attain
the pleasure of Allah and Paradise, which He
promised as a reward for His rightly guided
Muslim believers.
Mothers,
in the first place, before fathers, deserve
kindness, caring, good treatment, kind
company and best care and service from their
children. Abu-Horairah (RAA), was reported
as saying:
?A man
came to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), and asked
him: ?O Prophet of Allah! Who is the most
deserving and worthy of my good company and
care?? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), responded
?It is your mother.? The man asked, ?Who
comes next?? He (PBUH) said, ?Your mother?.
Again, the man asked, ?Who comes next?? He (PBUH),
said ?Your mother?, The man sked again, ?Who
comes next?? He (PBUH), said, ?Your father.
(56)
This
Hadith indicates that a mother has three
times the rights that of a father in
accordance with Islam. This entitlement is
given to the mother due to the tremendous
suffering that she goes through during the
various stages of the life of her child, in
pregnancy, delivery, nursing as well as the
shared responsibility of raising the child.
The fetus lives, nourishes and thrives on
the account of the mother?s digested food
while in his mother?s womb for nine months.
Similarly, the nursing baby does the same
for two years of his life, if the mother
decides to breast-feed her child. This has
been illustrated by Allah the Almighty, as
stated in the Glorious Quran 31:14:
And We have
enjoined on man to be dutiful and good to
his parents. His mother bore him in weakness
and hardship upon weakness and hardship; his
weaning is two years. Offer Me thanks and to
your parents; unto Me is the final
destination
Mothers,
therefore, are given priority over fathers,
and anybody else for that matter, in terms
of being kind, caring, dutiful, mindful,
good, obedient and helping.
Both
parents, in accordance to Islamic teachings
and principles, are to be obeyed, respected
and not differed with as long as they do not
command or order their children to disobey
their Creator, Allah the Almighty. If
parents ordered their children to perform
any act of disobedience to Allah, in any
form, shape or size, then they are to be
disobeyed in that particular aspect of
practice only. In the meantime, a
son/daughter must continue to present their
normal duties towards parents; they are
expected to serve them, help them in their
worldly affairs, come to their rescue when
they need them. Allah the Almighty, stated
in the Glorious Quran 31:15:
And if
parents strive with you to make you join in
worship with Me others that of which you
have no knowledge, then obey them not, but
behave with them at the lifetime kindly, and
follow the path of him who turns to Me in
repentance and obedience. to Me will be your
return, and I shall tell you what you did
throughout your life
Obedience
to parents must be given priority over all
others including the wife. This mean, that
by no means the wife is to be humiliated,
insulted, tortured or otherwise. individual
must be given his/her due right of respect
and obedience accordingly; however, parents
should be given priority in obedience over
all others.
Allah?s
pleasure with man is but an indication of
the pleasure of the parents with their
son/daughter, and vise versa. His dismay,
wrath and displeasure is due to occur as a
result of dismaying, displeasing or
humiliating one's parents. Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) said:
Allah?s
pleasure with man is but an indication of
the pleasure of the parents with their
son/daughter, and vise versa. His dismay,
wrath and displeasure is due to occur to man
as a result of dismaying, displeasing or
humiliating one's parents
(57)
Caring for
parents, being good and kind to them,
pleasing them and taking care of their
immediate needs, especially in old age is
preferred over participating actively and
involving physically in the various acts of
Jihad, striving for the cause of Allah.
Unless every Muslim, male and female, is
compelled to take an active part in Jihad
activities, the care for parents is given
utmost priority in accordance with Islam ?
unless Jehad became necessary and orderd by
the governor for the nation?s intrest- Ibn
Masaud (RAA), reported: ?I asked Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH): "O Allah?s Messenger! (PBUH)
What is the most commendable act in the
sight of Allah?" Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
said: ?Offering the prayer in its accurate
due time.? I, the reporter of the Hadith,
further asked: ?What comes next, O Prophet
of Allah?? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said:
?Being good, kind, respectful, obedient and
caring to your parents.? I, the reporter of
the Hadith, further asked ?What comes next,
O Prophet of Allah?? The Prophet said
?Striving, Jihad, for the cause of Allah.
(58)
Abdullah
bin ?Amr bin al-?Aas (RAA), also reported:
?A man came to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) and
said to him: ?O Prophet of Allah! I shall
give you my pledge of allegiance to migrate
and strive in the cause of Allah seeking His
reward only.? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) upon
hearing that asked the man: ?Are your
parents alive?? The man said: ?Yes, O
Prophet of Allah, both of them is living.?
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said,
If you seek
the pleasure and reward from Allah go back
to your parents and make sure that you do
the best you can to serve them, please them,
take care of their needs especially at the
old age and be good and kind to them
(59)
Parents
must be respected, obeyed and offered
financial assistance by their children, even
if they have different religion or faith,
other than Islam, as long as they do not
demand that their son/daughter do any act of
disobedience to Allah. Asma, the daughter of
Abu-Bakr (RAA), said: ?My mother, who was
still a pagan, came to visit with me. I went
to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), seeking his
advice on what I should do regarding her
visit, despite the fact that my mother was
expressing an interest in Islam, ?Should I
be kind and good and take financial care of
her?? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), responded,
Yes, indeed.
You should be kind and good and take care
financially of your mother even if the
mother was a pagan
(60)
A
son/daughter must help and give every
possible assistance to parents in their
various daily household chores. One must not
be aloof and refuse to physically help his
parents in their daily regular house
activities. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH),
himself, used to mend his own clothes, mend
his own shoes and help his family with their
daily chores. In fact, ?Aishah (RAA) once
was asked: ?What did Allah?s Messenger used
to do while at home?? ?Aishah (RAA), said,
?Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), used to serve and
assist his household; however, when he would
hear the call to prayer, he would
immediately leave the house.
(61)
Goodness,
kindness, obedience and caring for parents?
needs in fact essentially, be given higher
priority over all other voluntary acts of
prayer and worship. This is based on a
Hadith where Abu-Horairah (RAA), reported
the Prophet as saying:
None, except
three infants spoke while still in the
cradle These were:
Jesus son of Mary (PBUH).
The second is an Israelite
at the time of Juraij. Juraij was a monk
isolated himself in a cell and devoting his
time for prayer and worship of Allah. One day,
Juraij?s mother sought him out asking help
while he was indulged with his prayers. He
said: ?O Allah! I am confused, to whom should
I give priority; my prayers or my mother? He
preferred to continue his prayers, and
neglected his mother?s request for help. Upon
seeing that, Juraij?s mother left. On the
following morning the mother did the same, and
Juraij also continued his prayers and
neglected his mother?s call for help. On the
following day, Juraij?s mother came again to
him and called him to help her, as she had
done in the past two days; Juraij did not
respond. Upon seeing that, the mother said, ?O
Allah! Have Juraij look at the faces of
prostitutes before he dies.? Israelites at the
time used to highly admire the amount and
manner of Juraij?s worship, prayers and
seclusion to which he devoted himself. A very
beautiful and attractive prostitute that was
popular at that time proposed to Israelites,
?If you wish, I can tempt Juraij and cause him
to fall in love and commit illegal sexual
activities with me?. The prostitute set out to
execute what she proposed. She tried her best
to lure Juraij into illegal sex with her; but
to her surprise and dismay, her efforts were a
failure. Hence, she approached a shepherd who
used to stay close to Juraij?s cell and
offered herself to the shepherd who showed no
objection. The prostitute got pregnant. Upon
delivery, the prostitute accused Juraij of
being the father of the child. The Israelites
went to Juraij in his cell, drove him out,
destroyed the cell and started beating him. He
asked: ?What is the matter? Why are you doing
so?? They said: ?You have fornicated with this
prostitute and she delivered a baby from you,
while you pretend to be a pious man.? Juraij
said: ?Would you bring the baby here and let
me offer my prayers, in an attempt to prove to
you that I am not the father of that child.?
The Israelites permitted Juraij to offer his
prayers, and brought the baby. When Juraij
finished his prayers, he went to the baby and
pointed to his belly with his hand asking,
?Who is your real father, baby?? The baby, who
was still in the cradle, said, ?My father is
the shepherd.? Upon hearing the baby?s
statement and confession, the Israelites
started kissing Juraij, seeking his blessings
and said, ?Should we reconstruct a cell out of
gold for you?? He said, ?No. But just rebuild
it of clay and mud as it was built before.?
And so they did.
The third was an infant who
was nursing at his mother?s breast when a
knight wearing very fancy clothes, passed by
on a beautiful horse. The nursing mother said,
?O Allah! Let my son become in the future like
this knight.? Upon hearing this supplication,
the nursing infant left his mother?s breast
and said, while looking at the knight himself,
?O Allah! Do not make me in the future like
this knight?. Then, the infant went back to
sucking. (The narrator of the Hadith, Abu-Horairah
(RAA), said: ?I can remember the Prophet (PBUH)
imitating the infant?s nursing his mother?s
breast by placing his index in his mouth and
sucking it.?)
"Then the
mother and her nursing infant passed by a maid
who was beaten by her master and others
accusing her with fornication and theft. The
maid continued to say, ?Allah suffices me and
He is My Guardian!? The mother said, ?O Allah!
Do not let my child be like this woman in the
future.? Upon hearihis mother?s statement, the
infant left his mother?s breast and said, ?O
Allah! Let me be like this woman in the
future!? The mother upon hearing her infant?s
statement addressed him saying, ?Son! What is
the matter with you? A nicely dressed knight
passedby on a very nice horse, with a high
status and power and I wished tyou will be
like him in the future; you refused to be like
him. When we passed by that maid who was
beaten and disciplined for an accusation of
fornication and theft, and I prayed Allah for
you not to be tortured and accused like her;
you rejected my supplication also.? The infant
said, ?Mother, As for the knight, he was a
tyrant, and therefore I asked Allah not to
make me like him. As for the beaten and
accused maid, she has neither fornicated nor
stolen. Thus, I asked Allah to make me
innocent and pure like her!?
h62(62)
Islamic
teachings warn against disobeying parents,
disrespecting them and not fulfilling their
financial rights. Abu-Bakrah (RAA), reported
of Allah?s Messenger as saying:
The punishment
for all worldly sins may be deferred until the
Judgment Day by Allah except for the sin of
disobedience of children to their parents.
This sin?s punishment shall be imposed during
the lifetime of man and not deferred until
laterh73(63)
Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) was also reported as saying,
?Verily,
Allah has forbidden you to disobey your
mothers, to prevent people from their
entitlements, and to ask people for what you
are not entitled; He has further forbidden
burying your baby-girls while they are alive.
He, also dislikes for you to say ?Other people
said so and so". He, also, has forbidden you
to continuously ask others to give you; or to
question everything you see; or to waste your
wealth for no meaningful reason.h64
(64)
Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) illustrated that being good
and kind to parents is essential in the
fulfillment of the supplications and prayers
of man throughout his life. Ibn ?OmarRAA,
reported the Prophet as saying:
Three men in
the previous times set out on a business trip.
When night approached they slept in a cave at
the bottom of a mountain. Upon entering the
cave, a boulder rolled down and closed the
cave?s entrance completely. They talked it
over and concluded that there was no way out
of this trouble except with prayers and
supplications. ?We had better seek the help of
Allah according to the best and most righteous
deeds we have done in our lives
The first
man said, ?O Allah! I had two elderly parents
whom I never offered my wife and children
anything to eat or drink before I offer them.
One day I had to go for a long distance
seeking food for my herd and I was late coming
back. Upon arrival I found both of my parents
asleep. I milked the sheep in order to offer
my parents their dinner but I hated to wake
them up to drink. However, I did not offer my
wife or children before I offered them. I
remained standing next to them carrying the
milk pot in my hand waiting for them to wake
up. At the break of day, they woke up, by that
time my children were at my feet crying for
milk. At that time, they woke up and I offered
them their milk. O Allah! If you know that I
have done that for Your sake, please salvage
us from this trouble that we are suffering.?
Upon that the rock was moved slightly away
from the cave?s entrance, but it was not
enough to let a man out.
The second
man said, ?O Allah! I had a female cousin from
my father?s side who was the most beloved
woman to me on the face of Earth. I wanted her
very badly to make love to me, but she
refused. At one point in time, she underwent a
very bad financial problem and came under a
lot of financial stress due to famine. She
came to me asking for help. I offered her a
hundred and twenty 120 golden Dinars in order
to let me have what I wanted from her; i.e.,
illegitimate sexual relations with her outside
the wedlock. Under the pressure of her
pressing need and poor financial situation,
she agreed. When I was ready to begin the
intercourse with her, she said, ?O Cousin!
Fear Allah! And do not remove the seal of
virginity except with the right manner.? Upon
hearing that, I got up and did not touch her
although she was the most beloved and wanted
woman to me. I did not take back the gold
which I gave her.? Then he raised his hands to
heavens and said, ?O Allah! If You know I have
done what I did for Your cause and pleasure,
please remove the trouble and the stress that
we are suffering. Remove the rock from the
cave?s entrance so we can get out!? Upon
saying that, the rock was removed a very small
distance again, so small as to not enable a
person to get out of the cave.
The third
man said: ?O Allah! You know that I once
employed some workers and at the end of the
day I paid their wages except for one who left
without collecting his pay. Thus, I rightly
invested his wages in my business and kept a
special note and account for it. The money
that belonged to this worker grew a lot during
the years. At one point in time, after many
years, the worker came to me asking for his
wage that he did not take for that day of
work. I pointed out to him a large group
consisting of a herd of sheep, cows, camels,
slaves and servants, and said to him: ?All
that you see is yours! That is the wage that I
owe you!? The poor worker was stunned and
said, ?Please, do not ridicule and make fun of
me! I am only asking for one-day wage. The
employer said, ?I am neither ridiculing you
nor making fun of you. This is all yours.? The
worker took all that I pointed out for him and
left. Then the man raised his hands to heavens
and said, ?O Allah! If I have done what I did
for Your cause and pleasure, remove the
trouble and the stress that we are suffering.?
Upon that the rock rolled away from the cave?s
entrance and the three men left the cave free
again.h65(65)
Islamic
teachings also consider the pleasure of the
parents, being good, kind, helpful,
considerate, respecting and caring to them as
one of the things that abolishes the sins in
this world. It is reported that Abdullah Ibn
?Omar (RAA), said: ?A man came to Allah's
Messenger (PBUH) and said: ?O Prophet! I have
committed a major sin. Do you think that I can
repent to Allah from it?? Allah's Messenger (PBUH)
asked the man: ?Do you have a mother living??
The man answered negatively. Allah Messenger (PBUH)
further asked the man: ?Do you have a maternal
aunt living?? The man answered positively.
Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said to him ?Be kind,
caring, helpful, good, respective and keen to
her.h66(66)
This is, of course, due to the fact that the
mother's family, in accordance to Islam, has a
similar position and status to that of the
mother. Allah's Messenger (PBUH) is reported
to have said, ?The sister of the mother has a
similar position and status to that of the
mother.h67(67)
Islam
required that the rights of parents should
continue to be honored and respected even
after their death. Malik Ibn Rabee?ah
reported, ?While we were sitting with Allah's
Messenger (PBUH)H, a man from Bani Salamah
came to him and asked, ?O Allah's Messenger!
My parents passed away. Is there anything
required of me as a right of theirs after
their death which I should keep and maintain.?
Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said, ?Yes indeed.
You should maintain supplications and prayers
on their behalf. Ask Allah continuously to
pardon them and forgive them. Fulfill any
promises or pledges of allegiance that they
have taken or offered others to do. Honor,
respect and be hospitable to their friends and
maintain a strong ties with your relatives
which illustrate your love and respect to your
parents.h68(68)
All that we
have stated and illustrated are only broad
guidelines on the major and essential rights
of parents, in general, and mothers, in
particular, in accordance to Islamic
teachings. There are many other rights of
parents that we did not state here so as not
to bore the reader.
Islam
rethe same rights for women as is required
for men. woman must be extended every
possible good thing and hanice treatment.
Allah's Messenger (PBUH) is reported to have
said, ?Believers in their mutual care, love
and kindness are like one human body; if one
organ of that body aches, the entire body
will become feverish and man will stay awake
all night.h69(69)
If a woman
is a neighbor and she is a Muslim, she is
entitled to two rights: the right of Islam,
and the right of a neighbor. Allah the
Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran 4:36:
Worship Allah
and join none with Him in worship, and do
good to parents, kinfolk, orphans, the poor
who beg, the neighbor who is related to you,
the neighbor who is a stranger, the
companion by your side, the wayfarer you
meet, and those slaves whom your right hand
possesses. Verily, Allah does not like those
such as who are proud and boastful
One of the
woman?s right upon her neighbors is to be
good, caring and kind to her. She is also
entitled to be protected against various
evils of life, supported as needed,
respected and cared for. Allah Messenger (PBUH)
said:
Archangel
Gabriel continued to recommend me to take
care of the neighbor so much so that I
thought the neighbor is going to be my legal
heirh70
(70)
It is also
reported that Talhah (RAA), said, ?Omar Ibn
al-Khattab (RAA), went out of his home one
night. I decided to follow him to see what
he was doing during the night. I saw him
entering a specific house. After a while I
saw him coming out and entering another
house. In the morning I passed by the first
house and entered it to check who lives
there. To my surprise I found an old, blind
and disabled woman. I asked her, ?What did
the man who came in your home last night
want from you?? She said, ?This man has been
taking care of me for a time, getting me
what I need, helping me and supporting me.?
Talha, the reporter said to himself, ?Why
should I investigate Omar?s actions?h71(71)
Moreover,
if the woman was an aunt, from either side,
or a relative, regardless of the distance,
she is included in the kinfolk to whom Allah
commanded to be good, kind and supportive.
Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 47:22:
Would you
then, if you were given the authority, do
mischief in the land, and sever your ties of
kinship?
Allah's
Messenger (PBUH) is also reported to have
said, ?A person who deserts his kinship will
never enter paradise.h72(72)
Thus we
have seen some of the aspects of honoring,
respecting, caring and supporting women
according to Islamic teachings. Woman, we
believe, never witnessed, neither in the
past or in the present, any similar respect
and honor throughout the history of mankind
on Earth.
Chapter Four
There
are some misconceptions that have been
spread about women and their rights in
Islam. These misconceptions were not meant
for individual women themselves, but
rather an attack on Islam in particular.
People who raise such misconceptions aim
mainly to distort the beautiful picture of
women in Islam. Women, throughout the past
fourteen centuries of Islam, have been
honored, respected, cherished and
dignified. We shall present the main
misconceptions that have been raised about
women?s rights in Islam and women in Islam
in general.
Marriage to more than one wife is a
continuation of the practice established
and practiced in previous religions. It
is a practice as old as history itself.
All previous religions practiced,
accepted and condoned polygamy. The Old
Testament, and the Bible are at the top
of the list of the Divine Books that
stated such a practice and legalized it.
Many previous Prophets, before Prophet
Mohammad (PBUH) entered into plural
marriages. Prophet Abraham (PBUH) had
two wives. Prophet Jacob (PBUH) also had
four wives. Prophet Solomon (PBUH) had
many wives. Therefore, we notice that
plural marriage, as an issue, is not a
new practice attributed to Islam alone.
It is indeed an old practice, as old as
the history of man on Earth.
It has
stated in the old testament,
?A sister
should not be taken as a second wife so
as one will not harm the other during
her lifetime. (73)
Thus,
we notice that the Old Testament did not
forbid the idea of plural marriage
itself, but it rather forbade the man to
take a sister of the existing wife as a
second wife, while the first wife is
still alive. Moreover, the Old Testament
stated that Prophet David (PBUH), had
ninety-nine wives. It also stated that
Prophet Solomon (PBUH) had seven hundred
wives who were free noble women and
three hundred other wives who were slave
women.
When
Prophet Moses (PBUH) was commissioned to
the office of prophethood he accepted
the idea of plural marriage, and did not
set or determine a specific number of
wives to which a husband was entitled.
Later, the people of the Talmud, who
lived around Jerusalem, decided upon a
certain number of wives for a man. This
decision was neither from Moses (PBUH)
nor the Testament. However, some Jewish
scholars permitted a second wife or
more, if the first wife was permanently
ill, or barren. While other Jewish
scholars did not permit plural marriages
at all.
As for
the Bible, we all know that Jesus (PBUH)
was commissioned to complete the Laws of
Moses (PBUH) and we cannot find a single
quote in the Bible that forbid plural
marriage. In fact, the prohibition of
plural marriages in Christianity came
about as a result of legislation set
forth by the Christian church, but not
by the original teachings of
Christianity itself.
Irish
king, Ditharmet, for instance, had two
wives.
(74)
King
Frederick the Second had two wives based
on the church?s approval. Thus, we
notice that ?legalization? and
?illegalization? was in the hand of the
priests of the church and not in
accordance with original teaching of
Christianity itself.
Martin
Luther, the German who established the
Protestant sect considered plural
marriage an acceptable and condonable
principle of Christianity, and in fact
he himself advocated it on many
occasions.
(75)
?Truly,
Allah the Almighty, permitted plural
marriage to certain individuals of the
Old Testament and in special
circumstances. However, the Christian
who would like to emulate these
individuals is permitted to do so when
he is sure that his particular
circumstances are similar to the
circumstances of those individuals who
were permitted to have plural marriages.
Polygamy is much better than divorce in
any case.?
On the
other hand, the modern church under the
leadership of the Roman Catholic Pope
forbids polygamy or plural marriages.
For example:
The Orthodox forbid either
spouse to enter into another marriage as long
as the first marriage is still in existence.
The Orthodox do not permit
a second marriage contract for either spouse
unless and until the first marriage contract
is voided.
The Orthodox consider the
existing marriage an essential reason to
forbid a new (second or other) marriage.
Polygamy was well
known amongst Arab tribes prior to the advent of Islam.
In fact, there was no set limitations for the number of
wives the husband can take in wedlock. With the advent
of Islam, polygamy was condoned; however, a man was
restricted and limited to four wives only. Moreover,
Islam set certain rules and regulations to organize,
control and regulate this important feature in the
social life of Muslims. ?Omair al-Asdee was reported as
saying, ?When I converted toIslam, I was married to
eight wives. I discussed this with Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
who said, ?Keep four only, divorce the other four.
(76)
Polygamy was also well
known to the Egypti, Persians, Assyrians, Japanese and
Hindus. Russians and Germanic people also practiced it
as well as some Greek kings. Therefore, we can see that
polygamy is not an invented practice that is known,
practiced and applied only by Muslims and authorized
only by the religion of Islam. Many other previous
nations knew this social practice and applied it.
Polygamy, in
accordance with Islamic teachings and practices has its
own specific rules, regulations and conditions.
As Allah the
Almighty permitted polygamy, He stipulated and
pre-conditioned justice and fairness in treatment,
avoiding injustice and wrong practices against all
wives. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said,
He
who has two wives and does not treat them equally with
justice and fairness will come paralyzed (with one
side slanted) on the Day of Judgment
(77)
Justice and
fairness, in this context, applies in terms of
material things such as expenditure, fair division of
wealth, gifts, time, etc. As for emotional matters,
such as love and inclination towards one wife over the
other, it is recognized that man has no authority or
control over his heart and emotions. Feelings and
emotions are involuntary; therefore one is not to be
blamed for them. ?Aishah (RAA), the mother of
believers and the wife of Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) was
reported as saying ?Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
distributed everything justly amongst his wives; yet
after all, he used to say, ?O Allah! This is the fair
way of dividing what I possess amongst my wives. O
Allah! Blame me not for what You alone possess while I
do not.?, i.e., the heart, feelings and emotions of a
man.(78)
If a man knows for
sure that he is financially incapable of affording
another wife and another household, he is not
entitled to seek another marriage. A husband is not
allowed to exceed four wives, as stated earlier in
the Hadith of Allah?s Messenger (PBUH).
We would like to
point out here some of the factors and elements that
often urges man to think or seek another marriage.
We need to examine whether polygamy in itself is a
good or an evil practice in the society. We also
would like to know whether such a practice is good
for the wife or bad, and whether it is in her
interest or against.
- If a woman is sterile, and the
husband is interested in having children, what is
best for the wife in such a case: to be divorced
for no sin or crime (and become a burden on
herself and the society if she cannot earn and
there is nobody to support her financially), or to
remain in the household of her husband in addition
to his other wife?
- If a wife is chronically ill
and she cannot perform her marital duties, what is
better in her case: to be divorced, or to become a
second wife where she is perfectly honored, cared
for and provided for by her husband?
- Some men are sexually
demanding. One wife may not be able to fulfill the
lawful sexual desire of her husband. Or, if the
menstrual period or after-birth-confinement period
is especially longer than normal, or she has no
lawful sexual desire to match that of the husband,
what is better for both husband and wife, in such
a case? Is it lawful for the man to seek unlawful
sexual satisfaction somewhere else outside the
marriage, or to acquire another lawful wife who
keeps him chaste?
- There is no doubt that repeated
international and civil wars in various parts of
the world has taken its toll on men. Thus, the
number of females in most countries is more than
males. The best example of that were the First
World War and the Second World War, which claimed
huge numbers of men who participated in the
fighting. Statistics say that there were more than
twenty million men killed during these wars.
Therefore, if every man had only one wife, what is
the destiny of the women who do not get a fair
share of lawful marriage to satisfy their needs?
Should such women seek to satisfy their sexual
desires in unlawful ways like adultery,
fornication, and lesbian activities or else?
Truly, also, the abundance of women without
husbands, or males to care for them, helped spread
corruption and illegitimate sexual activities in
the society.
- As a consequence of war also,
there are many widows, divorcees and old maids in
societies. What is better for such women in this
case: to remain single and suffer all the
consequences of life and its demanding needs, or
to accept to be a second wife with an honest,
protective, honorable and chaste man?
Polygamy does
exist in all modern societies. This is a general
blanket statement, no doubt, but it is very true and
valid one. In all other societies, other than the
Muslims? society, polygamy exists in the form of
mistresses, sweethearts, girl friends, escort
services, common law marriage, etc. These types of
polygamy are widespread and have no end of forms.
The only difference in that is the title, i.e. the
title of the woman. In accordance to Islam, a second
wife enjoys all the rights and privileges of the
first wife. This is not the case in the modern
society man-woman relationships, if it is not a
marriage. These types of relationships do not oblige
the man (who behaves completely as a husband in
terms of co-habitation, marital relations, company,
companionship, etc.) to do anything special for such
a woman, support her financially, continue his
relation with her, etc. Such a relationship has no
legal backing (although some countries condone it
and accept it as a common practice). This type of
relationship between a man and a woman is merely a
cheap pleasurable one. It has no merits of its own
to stand on. It is meant for the fulfillment of the
sexual interest of both parties only. It imposes no
financial, social, or emotional obligations on
either side at all. If the woman becomes pregnant,
it is her own problem, and we all know that a child
who is born out of the wedlock is labeled as
?illegitimate? child, who is nothing but an added
burden on the entire society. Man, generally, is not
obliged to admit that the child is his, and is not
obliged to take financial responsibility of the
child.
As for the concept
and the practice of polygamy in the Islamic society,
it is restricted and limited to four wives only at
all times. It must be performed legally and lawfully
with a marriage contract, witnesses and the man must
bear all financial burdens and responsibilities that
arise from this marriage. The husband must pay a
dowry for the woman to whom he marries, and must
bear all expenses of the wife, her children, and the
household. All children of this marriage are
legitimate children who must be raised and cared for
under the responsibility of both parents.
One may ask, "If
we permit polygamy for men, why it is not permitted
for women as well!" The answer to this question is
as follows: Full equality between men and woman in
polygamy is impossible due to natural and physical
reasons, as we will explain.
Physically:
Man, in virtually
most societies of the world, has the authority over
the household. Just for the sake of discussion: if a
woman has two or more husbands, who will have the
authority and leadership of the house? Yet, again,
whose desires shall the woman fulfill, the first or
the second man? It is definitely impossible for a
woman to fulfill all the men?s desires, needs and
requests. If the woman preferred one over the other,
all will be angry and upset.
Naturally:
Woman can only
become pregnant once a year, if any. She can get
pregnant by oneman only. But, man, on the other hand
could have more than one child from more than one
woman in the same year, if he has more than one
wife. Moreover, if woman is allowed to be married to
morethan one man, who will be the real father of the
chiin case of pregnancy, and how would that be
determined?
We would like
here to present some statements of the Western
thinkers who demanded polygamy and considered it
the only solution for many problems of their
societies.
Gustave Le Bond,
the well-known French thinker says in his book
Arab Civilization, ?Polygamy enables the society
social crisis, prevents the mistresses? problem
and cures the society from illegitimate children.?
Anni Peasant, in
her book Indian Religions says,
(79)I
read in the Old Testament that the closest friend
to Allah, whose heart acts upon the Will of Allah,
was polygamous."
Moreover, the
New Testament did not forbid polygamy except for
priests or ministers of the church, who were
demanded to keep and maintain one wife only. Old
Indian religious books also permitted polygamy. It
is easy, however, to criticize others in their
religious practices. And that what made people
accuse Islam and attack it for the permission of
polygamy.
However, it is
strange that Westerners are against restricted and
limited polygamy of the Muslims, while they suffer
from wide scale prostitution in their own
societies. A close examining look at the Western
society illustrates that only a few pure, chaste
and honest men respect their clean marital
relationships and honor their marriage to one
single wife and have no other sexual relationships
outside marriage.
It is an
incorrect and inaccurate statement, therefore, to
prescribe to a community in which the men maintain
a single marriage, if they are indeed having
mistresses, girl friends and other means of sexual
relationships outside the marriage to a legal and
lawful wife. If we are to be fair and just, we can
see that polygamy in Islam protects, honors,
maintains and respects women in the society.
Polygamy is better than the Western prostitution
that permits a man to have a mistress or a girl
friend to fulfill his sexual desires with no
respect to the feelings, emotions, needs and honor
of the women. The man will disown that woman as
soon as he gets his satisfaction. The man has no
social commitment or obligation towards the
mistress or the girl friend who fulfills his
sexual needs and give him the company he needs
temporarily. Yes, ?it is acceptable to declare
that both polygamy and fornication or prostitution
are bad and unacceptable, but it is unfair for the
non-muslims to blame a Muslim for doing the same
thing that he does while his society accepts and
condones.?
Jawid, the
well-known English scholar, says, ?The stiff
British system which prevents polygamy is an
unfair and unacceptable system. It severely hurts
approximately two million women who have become
old maids. These women have lost their youth and
were deprived having children. Thus, these women
were forced to throw away the moral values as one
throws the pit of the date.
(80)
Mobenar, a
member of the French Parliament noted:
?There are two
and a half million French girls now who cannot
find a husband, if we assume that every French
young man will marry only one woman. I frankly
declare what I truly believe is true that ?a woman
will not enjoy a healthy life unless she becomes a
mother.? I believe that any law which passes a
judgment that such a big number of the members of
the society should have opposing, contradicting
and neglecting lives to fulfill the natural laws
of man on the Earth is but a cruel and savage law
that contradicts the simplest meaning of justice
and fairness.
(81)
In 1959, the
United Nations published a special publication
illustrating,
(82)?This
publication has proved by numbers and statistics
that the entire world is now facing a growing
problem of illegitimate children, as opposed to
legitimate children. The number of illegitimate
children has increased 60% in some countries. In
Panama, for instance, the percentage of
illegitimate births soared to 75% of the total
number of births in the country. This means that
three out of every four children are illegitimate,
born outside the wedlock. The highest percentage
of illegitimate births is stated to be in Latin
America. In the meantime, the publication proves
and indicates that the number of illegitimate
births in the Islamic world is almost nil (in
comparison with other countries). The editor of
the publication goes on to say ?Islamic countries
are protected against such social problems and
disease due to the fact that the people practice
polygamy.??
Allah the
Almighty stated in the Glorious Quran 1:282:
And get two
witnesses out of your own men. And if there are
not two men (available), then a man and two
women, such as you agree for witnesses, so that
if one of them (two women) errs, the other can
remind her
Allah
illustrated in this verse testimonies to assure
the rights of others will not be valid unless
two men, or one man and two women offer them.
Divine wisdom
has granted women, in general, very sensitive
emotions, tender feelings, tender care and love.
This enables a woman assumes her natural task of
child bearing, nursing and taking care of all
the needs of the raised child, full custody of
the child at the early age of life, etc. These
responsibilities require a great heart, special
care, deep emotional involvement and affection.
Based on this
emotional reality of a woman, she might very
well follow her emotional inclinations and
deviate from truth , due to her emotional
involvement in a case. A woman?s loving and very
kind feelings might supercede what she has
witnessed, and thus she may distort the story of
her witness and testimony. Therefore, a divine
precautionary measure was established to
eliminate any emotional involvement of a woman
in any case of testimony or witness in serious,
critical and extremely dangerous cases, such as
murders and other serious crimes and offenses.
If a woman is present at a crime where a murder
is being committed, she might close her eyes to
avoid seeing such an awful crime taking place. A
woman who witnesses such a serious crime also
may attempt to run away and escape the crime as
well. A woman who witnesses such serious crimes
are most likely to be emotionally affected and
touched, which may result in loss of temper and
composure. This, of course, shall affect the
woman?s testimony if she is called as a witness
to testify about the crime. We would like to
point out here also one of the essential
principles of the legal and judicial system in
Islam which is: ?A capital punishment in Islam
may be removed, or considered inapplicable, if a
doubt arises in the case (or in the crime which
is committed).?
Islam has
granted women full financial freedom in terms of
independence and financial decision making, and
made her exactly equal to men in that regard.
However, woman?s natural role in life, in
raising children and caring for the family
requires her to stay in the house for longer and
extended periods. This natural role of the woman
keeps her away from market places, where the
majority of crimes are usually committed. A
woman, therefore, is rarely there to witness a
fight, a dispute from beginning to end, a murder
and the like. Moreover, most of these disputes
and murders are not a major concern of the
woman, unless she herself is a part of it,
involved with it somehow. Thus, remembering the
fine details of such crimes and disputes will be
extremely hard and next to impossible for a
woman. However, if there was another woman on
the scene of a crime, and that woman was called
to stand as a witness, the first woman?s
possibilities of forgetting the details of the
witnessed crime will be reduced as there are two
testimonies now as oppose to one only. This,
therefore, justifies the reason for demanding
and pretwo women?s testimonies on a crime or any
other legal ofto validate the actual performance
of the crime. That is how the verse should be
understood and perceived: ?So that if one of
them (two women) errs, the other can remind
her.?
This indicates
that in the case of errors in testimony against
a described witnessed crime, another testimony
from a second woman may clear the erroneous
situation. It is not as some individuals claim:
?Calling two
women testimonies and witnesses is an insult to
the woman?s intelligence and a dishonor to her
integrity.? If that were the case, a single
woman?s testimony would not be acceptable also
in the private affairs of women. Islam accepts a
single woman?s testimony in confirming the
virginity of a woman, a delivery of a child,
clarification of female sexual defects and other
matters which mandate examination of a woman?s
private parts due to a dispute. On the other
hand, Islam rejects one single man?s testimony
in the least significant financial matters such
as lending or borrowing funds and other
transactions. In fact, the previously stated
cases of acceptable single women's testimony are
far more important than what men are shoulders
in that area. Therefore, we should realize that
a single woman?s testimony in serious matters is
established in order to preserve and prove the
due rights of various individuals in the
society, based on that testimony.
Moreover, we
would like to point out here that testimony in
itself is not a privilege or an honor. It is
rather a burden that many male and female
attempt to avoid in any society (i.e., the jury
duty in the United States). Therefore, Allah
commanded people to offer their testimonies and
not to try to escape or withhold it, as they
will be asked about it on the Day of Judgment.
Allah the Almighty, stated in the Glorious Quran
2:281:
And the witnesses
should not refuse when they are called on (for
evidence)
The address
here is general, for both male and female. Many
people all over the world try to avoid becoming
a witness and attempt not to be involved in
offering testimonies due to the fact that there
is a great burden and botheration in such a
discourse. One is required to go to the court,
sit on the witness stand, take an oath to tell
the truth, be cross-examined and bear many other
burdens. Financial and physical burdens may
result from offering witness and testimony. A
witness may be assassinated in some odd cases.
Islam therefore aims at eliminating many of
these burdens from the woman in terms of
testimony.
In Islam a
woman is not required to spend on the family and
take charge and become financially responsible
for the household (unless she wants to
participate willingly), as this is the
responsibility of the man. Islam is meant for
the woman to dedicate herself, her soul, her
time and her efforts to the major task of ?the
maintenance of the human race and the
generations.?
One man?s
testimony, on the other hand, is not acceptable
in financial matters. There should be two male
witnesses to prove the financial right of a
claimant. No one, that we know of, considers
this act as an insult on the man?s intelligence
and contrary to his rights.
Moreover,
Islam considers the testimony of a wife exactly
equal to the testimony of her husband, when a
husband accuses his wife with committing
adultery if he has no evidence. Allah the
Almighty stated in the Glorious Quran 24:6-9:
As for those who
accuse their wives, but have no witnesses except
themselves, let the testimony of one of them be
for four testimonies (i.e., testifies four
times) by Allah that he is one of those who
speak the truth. And the fifth (testimony)
(should be) the invoking of the Curse of Allah
on him if he be of those who tell a lie (against
her). But it shall avert the punishment (of
stoning to death) from her, if she bears witness
four times by Allah, that he (her husband) is
telling a lie. And the fifth (testimony) should
be that the Wrath of Allah be upon her if he
(her husband) speaks the truth
Allah the
Almighty stated in the Glorious Quran 4:34:
Men are
protectors and maintainers of women, because
Allah has made the one of them to excel the
other, and because they spend (to support
them) from their means
Financial
and moral responsibilities of a household
require a strong personality, precision and
decisiveness in decision-making, etc.
Managing, directing and running the household
affairs, in accordance with Islam, is the
man?s responsibility, and not the woman?s. The
physical and mental make-up of men qualify
them to take charge of these responsibilities.
This responsibility is granted to man due to
natural qualifications, as explained earlier,
and due to earned reasons as well. Man, in
accordance with Islam, is required to take
care of the household financially, physically,
emotionally and otherwise. Man, in accordance
with Islam again, is demanded to protect the
woman, take care of her needs, and secure all
the needs of the entire household. The man is
a responsible "shepherd" of his own household,
and he will be asked about ?his herd?, so to
speak, as we have been taught by Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH).
A woman, on the
other hand, is weaker in comparison with man.
Due to many things that happen to her
physically and take place during her lifetime
such as bearing children, delivery, nursing,
child-care and custody, etc. She is not as
qualified as man to take charge of the entire
household responsibilities. This is, of
course, no insult to her at all.
Menses,
additionally, affect women drastically due to
the amount of blood loss every month.
Pregnancy subjects women to tremendous pain.
During pregnancy, women face more fatigue and
the slightest effort will negatively affect
them. During pregnancy, women are more
concerned with the fetus than their own
selves. A pregnant woman also worries about
her delivery, whether it is going to be a
normal delivery or cesarean section where she
suffers a surgery in addition to the suffering
of the pregnancy itself. Also, a pregnant
woman expresses too much concern with the
welfare of the baby whether such a baby would
be normal, healthy or else. All these concerns
affect the mentality of a woman and will be
reflected in her life, attitude and behavior.
Women
require a confinement period for rest after
delivery. Women suffer a lot of pain
throughout their pregnancy and delivery. The
after-birth confinement period calls for a
full rest mentally and physically for a
period that varies from a woman to a woman.
A
nursing mother donates or gives a certain
portion of her digested food to her
nursing child. This process affects the
nursing mother?s health. Many nursing
women suffer hair loss, anemia, dizziness
and general fatigue during the nursing
period (that could last until the child is
three years old if not weaned). Moreover,
childcare and custody require a lot of
effort and hard work from the mother and
it is a very time-consuming process.
?Abbas
Mahmoud al-?Akkad, the well-known Egyptian
writer, notes:
?Women
have a very special emotional make-up that
does not resemble the emotional make-up of
man. The companionship of a little infant
or child requires a lot of similarity and
resemblance between the child?s mentality
and hiscompanion, the mother. She has to
understand what he wants, what he needs
and how he thinks and feels. Therefore,
and based on these facts, a woman is much
more responsive to emotions. This makes it
difficult for a woman when compared with
man in terms of being firm, fierce and
determined when needed.
(83)
Dr. Alex
Liberelle, a Nobel Prize winner, says
while illustrating the natural organic
differences between man and woman:
(84)
?Matters
that differentiate between man and woman
are not limited to sexual organ, the
presence of the womb and pregnancy. These
matters are also not limited to the
difference of teaching methods of man and
woman. In fact, these differences are of
basic nature. The tissues of the body in
both male and female are different. The
chemistry of the bodies is also different
in both. Certain glands excrete certain
secretions that are only suitable for a
specific gender. The woman is completely
different from man in terms of the
chemical material secreted from the ovary
inside the woman?s body.?
Those
who call for complete equality between men
and women do not understand these basic
facts and essential differences (or else
they ignore them). Callers and defenders
of women?s equal rights demand the same
type of education to be given to both male
and female regardless of their sexes, and
to be offered the same type of jobs,
tasks, responsibilities and positions.
Woman?s nature and essential physical
make-up, however, differs completely from
that of man. Every body cell of the woman
has a feminine quality. Due to this
reason, we see that the organs of both men
and women are different from each other
completely.
The same
applies on the women?s nervous system as
well. We must realize that the rules and
regulations of the nervous system are
strict and accurate as that of the
astronomical rules and regulations. They
are extremely precise. There is no way to
alter, modify or change these rules and
regulations. We must accept these rules
and regulations as they are and not
attempt to change them. We should not seek
any unnatural imposition on them. Women
must build up their talents based on their
own natural gifts, and they must not
imitate men.?
There is
another point that we should bring up
here. The muscles of men are naturally
more powerful than those of women. This is
a well-established fact. Men can perform
more tedious, tiring, laborious and manual
jobs, while women, most of the times, are
not prepared for comparable work
performance. Thus, men are more naturally
equipped and qualified to assume the role
of leadership over the household in
general, and over women, in particular.
Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 4:11:
Allah
commands you as regards your children?s
(inheritance); to the male, a portion
equal to that of two females
Those
who misunderstood Islam claim that Islam
does injustice to women in terms of
inheritance. How could it be fair to
grant the male (son) a portion equal to
two portions of that of the female,
(although they are brother and sister of
the same parents)? Allah the Almighty,
offered a full and detailed method of
women?s inheritance in the Glorious
Quran. Allah has stated three cases for
women?s inheritance as follows:
- A woman will have
an equal share as that of the man.
- A woman will have
an equal share to that of the man, or
maybe a little less.
- A woman will have
half the share of man, which is the
most common case.
Those who are interested in further
details about this subject may review
lengthy discussion in the books about
inheritance in Islam. In fact there is
a special branch of Islamic knowledge
called ?Estate Division Science? that
deals with all the different ways of
dividing an inheritance, the proper
share of all relatives which called
"Estate-Division and Inheritance"
close and distant, etc.
In
fact, one must be fair and just. Prior
to passing any judgment about ?unfair
treatment of Islam to women in terms
of inheritance?, one must examine this
subject closely, before making any
comment. The following is a simple
example of the way Islam passes a
verdict to distribute the wealth of
deceased among his heirs:
?A
man passed away leaving a son and a
daughter. The deceased left a sum of
US$ 3000.00 for his heirs. In this
case, and in accordance with Islamic
rules of estate division, the son is
entitled to $ 2000.00 and the
daughter?s share is $ 1000.00.?
Let
us examine the heirs? situation after
the death of the father. The son?s
share of inheritance is decreasing
because he has to pay a dowry (if he
intends to get married). He is also
required to furnish his house for the
marriage and he is also required to
take care of all the needs of his
household in terms of their expenses.
The son is also required to take care
of his widow mother, grandparents (if
still alive) and other poor and needy
relatives. The daughter, on the other
hand, is not required to spend any of
her inherited money (unless she
pleases), even if she is a wealthy and
rich person. If she gets married she
is entitled to a dowry from her
husband. The husband is required to
secure all her financial needs as
well, in terms of house expenses,
health care, childcare and all other
financial obligations of the family.
Therefore, it is the man?s
responsibility to take care of all the
financial needs of the woman and his
entire family according to his means.
The daughter portion of inheritance
will increase, rather than decrease,
if she gets married and receives a
dowry from the husband. She will be
entitled to all living expenses in
terms of accommodation, food,
health-care, child-care and all, from
her husband. Man, however, is even
required to pay alimony and child
support, in case of divorce or
separation. A female heir is entitled
to do as she desires with her wealth,
funds and money. She may invest her
share of the inheritance or do as she
please with it. Thus, this example
illustrates that the daughter?s share
of the inheritance remains intact,
while the man?s share is spent for
many lawful and valid reasons due to
financial responsibilities and
obligations that he undertakes in this
life. The woman, at least
theoretically, is entitled to maintain
her share of the inheritance.
Islamic laws and teachings differ from
all other national and international
legal systems all over the world. In
some societies, the father does not
carry any financial responsibilities
for his own daughter, or son for that
matter, after a certain age. The son
and daughter are required to take care
of their own financial needs and
arrangements. According to Islam, a
father, (or even a brother after the
death of the father) is required to
take care of the entire financial
needs of a daughter (or sister) until
she is married. From the time a female
marries, her financial
responsibilities are her husband?s
obligation, according to Islamic
teachings. In the meantime, laws that
equalize the inheritance share for
both male and female heirs require
them to bear equal financial
obligations and responsibilities as
well.
Therefore, demanding a ?fair?, ?just?
or ?equal? share of inheritance to
both male and female Muslims who do
not have equal financial obligations
and responsibilities is an unfair and
unjust demand. Thus, it is only fair
and just to give preference to a male
heir, in light of the previous
discussion, over the female heir from
the inheritance of the father, mother
or else according to Islam. Man and
woman, according to Islam, do not
shouthe same financial obligations and
responsibilities. Therefore, it will
be unfair to grant them equal
inheritance, as decided upon by Allah
the Almighty. Allah the Almighty,
relieved woman from all financial
stresses, constraints,
responsibilities and obligations, and
honored the woman by making her
entitled to get all what she needs,
have her attended to by her husband,
brother, or son. All male members of
the family are required and obliged to
bear any financial burden of the
female members of the family. Yet, a
female is entitled, by Islamic laws,
to a half share of the portion of that
of the male inheritance. This is only
fair and just, we believe.
One
important thing we should point out
concerning the law of inheritance of
Islam is that ?every male and/or
female heir has a specified share of
inheritance that he/she is entitled
for; and one cannot deprive the heir
his/her share of the inheritance.?
This is unlike the British Law which
can grant the owner freedom in ?so-far
as his bequis concerned based upon a
will he/she makes before his/her
death. Such a will may depriveall the
legal and lawful heirs from the
inheritance of their relatives.
However, in accordance with Islamic
teachings, man is entitled to limit
only one third of his/her legacy in a
will, and cannot exceed this set
limit.
Moreover, in accordance with Islam,
all expenses resulting from
?blood-money? are shouldered by the
men of the family. Women do not bear
the responsibility of the
?blood-money?.
Gustave Le Bond says in his book Arab
Civilization:
?The
principles of inheritance which have
been determined in the Glorious Quran
have a great deal of justice and
fairness. The person who reads the
Glorious Quran can perceive these
concepts of justice and fairness in
terms of inheritance through the
verses I quoted. I should also point
out the great level of efficiency in
terms of general laws and rules
derived from these verses. I have
compared British, French and Islamic
Laws of inheritance and found that
Islam grants the wives, whom are
considered by Westerners to be
ill-treated and that Muslims are not
fair in treating their wives (and
women in general) are entitled to
inheritance rights that are lacking in
our laws.?
Islam stipulates that blood money is
to be paid for a woman?s murder as
half of that which is paid for a
man. This is of course when a Muslim
woman is killed by accident, rather
than a capital crime.
As
for murder, which requires capital
punishment, both male and female are
equal in the sight of the Islamic
laws in this case, as both male and
female are equal in terms of human
rights. However, in the case of
accidental killing where the
blood-money paid to the heirs of the
victim is half of that paid for a
man?s killing, it is due to the
damage done to the family of that
man after his death. The family
whose breadwinner is killed loses
the person who is financially
responsible for the entire family,
although a man?s emotional care of
the family is not comparable to that
of the woman?s.
As
for the family members whose mother
is killed accidentally, they only
miss, mainly, their mother?s love,
caring and affection, matters which
most men cannot provide. However,
the financial situation should not
be effected that much with the loss
of the mother. Of course, there is
no wealth or financial compensation
which can substitute for a mother?s
love, caring and affection.
The blood money in itself is not a
price, a value or even a true
compensation for the killed person.
It is only the least assessment of
the damage caused to the family of
the killed person, whether it is a
father or a mother of a family.
Thus, the blood money set forth for
a woman to be half of that
determined for the man is
self-explanatory.
Allah the Almighty, created all
mankind from a single male and
female. He, also placed love and
affection for one another between
them, so as to cooperate to
construct this world the way we
see it now. He, the Almighty,
specified man, the male, with
power, strength and endurance in
order that he may seek provisions.
In the meantime, Allah the
Almighty specified the female, the
woman, and equipped her with what
it takes to reproduce the progeny
of mankind. She is well equipped
with necessary apparatus to bear
children, deliver them, nurse them
and care for them.
Consequently, the woman has been
endowed with love, kindness, care,
sympathy, care and affection in
order to carry out her hard duties
with a smile on her face and with
pride and dignity. Thus, based on
this natural preparation and
delegation of responsibilities,
and based on the unique
specifications of both male and
female, it is only natural for man
to be prepared to work outside the
house, and earn the bread of the
family. On the other hand, it is
only natural for the woman, the
female, to work inside the house
and take care for its needs in
general.
Islam does not, however, deprive
the woman from the right to work.
In fact, Islam permits the woman
to directly conduct her business
contracts and financial
transactions. All such contracts
and transactions are sound and
valid in the sight of Islamic Laws
and teachings and they are in no
need of the approval of the
husband, the father or any other
guardian. Islam, however,
organized these transactions and
set rules and conditions for them.
If any of these set conditions is
not observed, the permission given
to the woman to practice this
right will be rendered null and
void, and the woman will become
forbidden to use her right.
- Woman?s work
outside her house must not conflict
with her duties and responsibilities
inside her house, for her husband and
children. As we all know, woman is
entitled to certain specific rights
from her husband, and man is entitled
to a certain and specific rights from
his wife. Both also owe their children
certain and specific rights that must
not be wasted either.
- A woman must work
with other women. She must not work in
a co-ed. environment where she comes
into physical contact with other men.
Lady
Cook, the well-known English writer
says in New Echo:
?Men
like (and prefer) the co-ed.
environment. Thus, women are lured to
something that contradicts with their
human nature. The greater the co-ed.
environment (between male and female),
the society will have and produce more
illegitimate children.. This is the
greatest disaster.(85)
In
his book, International Peace and
Islam, late Sayed Qutub says:
?It
is the right of both man and woman, to
feel satisfied with each other as
companions. Neither one of them should
be subjected to temptation by the
other in such a way that one would be
emotionally (and physically) deviated,
if not dragged fully into sin and
drift towards immoral decay. Such
actions will definitely threaten the
precious and holy ties between them.
In fact, there will be no room for
trust and confidence in one another.
The deviation resulting from this
morality drift is due to the co-ed.
relationships which appear to be
increasing day by day. As women walk
freely wearing all kinds of
attractive, short, tempting garments,
that do not modestly cover their
bodies but rather show their
attractions, wicked- minded men,
people with low- moral values and
inviting people with weak- faith to
abuse women and attack their chastity.
Regardless of what some individuals
say about co-ed. environments, it
definitely softens the hearts and
minds of people. posing a real threat
and danger to morality and moral
values of the society. Regardless of
what they claim, co-ed. provides both
sexes with the necessary experience
that is needed for a long lasting
marital tie,which is really nothing
but nonsense. Many marriages are
failing and ending with divorce and
broken homes even after full knowledge
ofone party to the other. Many are the
illegitimate sexual relationships in
societies that believe in co-ed. as a
way of life. The percentage of
pregnant high school girls, as a
result of a free co-ed. society
reached 48% in one high school in the
United States. A look at the broken
homes which were erected on the so
called love and free choice, increased
drastically between the years of 1890
and 1948 as follows: 1890 = 6%, 1900 =
10%, 1914 = 14%, 1930 = 14%, 1940 =
20%, 1946 = 30% and in 1948 = 40%, and
it is still on the rise.?
- The job or the work
that the woman performs outside her
house must be, in the first place, a
lawful job that suits the nature of
the woman. A woman, for instance, must
not be involved in heavy industrial
jobs, actual combat in the armed
forces , and other jobs to which men
are more inclined such as sewer
cleaning, general maintenance, street
cleaning, road construction, etc.
The
question that poses itself here is: Why does
the woman work?
If a woman
is working to earn her own living expenses,
Islam has preserved this right for her.
Islam obliges the father to take care of the
entire financial needs and obligaof his
daughter until she marries. Upon marriage,
the woman?s financial needs and obligations
(and her ?s needs) must be born by her
husband. If the husband dies, while the
father of the wife is still alive, then the
father must resume the financial
responsibilities of his daughter, and her
children, again, as he did before her
marriage. If the father is no longer living
and the woman has children who are adults
and earning, then the financial needs and
responsibilities of the mother becomes her
son's. If woman?s children are minors and
cannot provide for the family, then, the
financial obligations and responsibilities
of the widow must be born, in accordance
with Islam, by her brothers, if they are
available. If the woman has no brothers,
then her financial responsibilities lie with
the nearest of kin and relatives. Therefore,
we notice that woman?s financial needs, (at
least theoretically and in accordance with
the Islamic teachings) are assured for her
from life to death, throughout her entire
life, and she is not demanded to work. This
is mainly done and arranged for the woman to
concentrate on her most paramount social
mission and duty; to take care of the house,
to raise children, to take good care of the
needs of the entire family members, a
mission which requires great efforts, many
sacrifices and devotion.
The
well-known English scholar Samuel Smiles,
one of the pillars of the English
renaissance says:
(86)
?The
system that has required women to work in
factories and industrial areas, regardless
of the national wealth it brings, has
destroyed the family life. It has attacked,
in fact, the basic structures and
foundations of the house and destroyed the
essential pillars of the family. It has cut
and destroyed social ties as well. Stripping
the wife from her husband (by spending long
hours working in factories), and depriving
children of their rights for proper tender
and maternal care, has resulted in lower
moral values for the woman. The real job and
profession of a woman is to raise a good,
sound and moral family. She is mainly
required to take care of house
responsibilities, home economics and other
domestic needs. Work in factories has
stripped the woman, as we pointed earlier,
of all these responsibilities which changed
the looks and the realities inside the home.
Children, as well, are often neglected and
raised with no sound standards. The love and
affection between husband and wife are
somewhat extinguished. The womanlooses the
stays or the most sought after, wanted,
admired and loved wife to man, after he got
used to seeing her in the factory next to
him doing the same thing he does. Woman
comes under many influences and pressures
that changes her mentality and thinking
pattern on which moral values and virtues
are established.?
In fact,
the First Lady of South Africa calls for the
return of woman to the home saying:
?The most
natural place for woman is her own home. The
main task and responsibility for a woman
must be to care for her husband and attend
to the needs of her children.
(87)
She also
said in an address to a women?s conference
in the capital of South Africa:
?The main
task and responsibility for a woman must be
to care for her husband and attend to the
needs of her children?This is our duty in
society. It is a duty in which we should
take special pride as it produces successful
men and sound generations.?
We have
to realize, in the first place, that Islam
hates and dislikes divorce. Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH) says:
?The most
hated and disliked act in the Sight of
Allah, although it is lawful, is divorce.
(88)
He (PBUH)
was further reported as saying:
May Allah
the Almighty, curse a man who often
practices divorce after each new marriage
(89)
Islam,
on the other hand, mandates that
preliminary solutions must be sought for
most disputes that occur inside the house
between a husband and a wife in order to
avoid divorce. Allah the Almighty, stated
in the Glorious Quran 4:128:
And if a
women fears cruelty or desertion on her
husband?s part, there is no sin on both of
them if they make terms of peace between
themselves; and making peace is better
The most
natural and logical way to this peace is
to let the man have control over the
divorce process, and not the woman. Man is
financially obliged to take care of his
wife, household and family. The man is the
one who pays the dowry, bears the
financial responsibilities and burdens of
the entire household, under normal
conditions, and takes care of housing and
accommodation, ?etc. Thus, he should be
theoretically entitled to terminate the
marital life if he is willing, ready and
prepared to take such a huge loss
financially and emotionally that results
from a divorce. The husband must be fully
aware that he will lose the dowry he spent
for the marriage, the alimony and child
support, and the expenses of a new
marriage.
Additionally, man is more capable,
theoretically, of controlling his temper,
emotions and personal reactions if upset
about large or small issues in life,
especially in terms of disputes with his
wife. The husband should never seek
divorce as a first solution to end his
daily suffering with his wife. Divorce to
man is the final solution when life
becomes catastrophic, meaningless,
problematic and can no longer be tolerated
with his wife.
However,
the woman has the right to divorce herself
from her husband in accordance with the
Islamic teachings, provided that she has
stipulated this before consummating the
marriage, and the husband approves it.
Moreover, Islam permits the wife to be
divorced from her husband upon request if
the husband abuses her by using foul
language engages in insulting manner of
speech or beating. Also, she will be
entitled to divorce if the husband is
impotent and cannot perform his marital
duties, or if he chooses not to have
sexual intercourse with his wife and
fulfill her needs, or if he contracts a
terminal illness after the marriage, or he
contracts syphilis or any other venereal
diseases that may harm the wife or, at
least, make her loose her desire to be
with that man.
Islam
conveys a perfect understanding and
appreciation of human nature. Woman, in
certain incidents, is given the right to
seek separation from her husband, exactly
as man has the right. If a wife reaches
the extreme limits and hates her
huswholeheartedly and feels she can no
longer live with him in any circumstances,
then she has the right to divorce. This
form of divorce is called ?Khul??; it is
made at the insistence of the wife who
must pay compensation to her divorced
husband. A Muslim judge will look into the
case if the husband refuses to accept the
wife's request. In most cases, the judge
will pass a sentence in favor of the
women.
Selecting and choosing the right and
most suitable wife is a very difficult
task. It is, however, much more
difficult to choose and select a
husband. Furthermore, the husband may be
able to seek divorce from his wife if he
realizes that she was not suitable. This
practice, however, is not as easy to
achieve for a woman.
Woman
remains on the weak side in all human
societies. Islam therefore exerts every
effort to protect the woman, preserve
her rights and seek every possible means
to take care of her. Islam demands the
father, the mother, the uncles from both
sides, the grandfathers, brothers and
all other relatives to help select,
choose and pick the right and most
suitable husband for their females. The
woman must not be the victim of a failed
marriage because she will suffer the
most harms. Islam therefore requires a
guardian for the female, a ?Wali?, in
order for the marriage to be sound and
valid in accordance witIslamic
teachings. If a guardian is not readily
available, a substitute must be sought.
Allah?s Messenger (PBU) stated,
A
marriage is not valid without a guardian
[for the woman]h90(90)
A
guardian, usually, is concerned with his
ward and her well being. This, by no
means, is a denial of the woman?s
freedom to do what she likes, i.e. to
choose and select her own husband.
Islam, indeed, has granted the virgin
woman, as well as the divorcee and
widow, the right to accept or reject any
person who proposes to marry her. Islam
does not permit the female?s guardian,
whoever he might be, to impose or apply
pressure on her to force her to accept
any person who proposes a marriage, or
even to reject such a proposition.
Physical or mental pressures are not
condoned in terms of requesting or
forcing the female to get married. This
is based on the statement of Allah?s
Messenger (PBUH):
A
divorcee (or a widow) must not be wed
unless she is asked permission (and
approval). And a virgin woman must not
be wed (or offered for marriage) unless
she is consulted
(91)
If a
woman is forced to accept a marriage,
she is entitled, in accordance to
Islamic teachings, to present her case
before a Muslim judge to seek a verdict.
This is based on the statement of
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), when a woman,
called al-Khansa bint Khitham, came
complaining to him that her father made
her marry someone (just to remove a
shame he suffered due to the fact that
she was divorced. The (divorcee) woman
came complaining to Allah?s Messenger (PBUH),
that her father forced her to marry,
although she was divorced, and she hated
that marriage. Allah?s Messenger (PBUH)
disapproved of that marriage and
considered it invalid.h92(92)
Similarly, Islam requires the acceptance
of the woman and her approval of the
marriage to a certain man, as it
requires the presence of a male guardian
for the marriage validity in order to
complete a marriage contract.
Islam
truly urged Muslims to marry and
encouraged Muslims to seek settlement in
a marriage. The major goal of marriage
in accordance with Islam, however, is to
establish an everlasting relationship
between a male and a female rather than
a temporary relationship that aims at
temporal and quick satisfaction of any
kind. The female, i.e. the wife in this
case, is the second partner in this
partnership, hence, her acceptance,
approval and condoning of the marriage
is also required.
However, as women are more emotional, in
general, than men, and are easily
affected with various matters around
them, and in common, women are easily
tempted with the appearance of things,
rather reality of things, Islam gave the
right to the guardian to refuse and
reject a person who proposes to marry a
woman if he is not a sound match for
her. Generally, men are more acquainted
with other men than women. A man is more
capable of finding out more about the
characteristics of a man than a woman.
But, if an appropriate man who is a
sound and good match for a woman
proposed marriage but the guardian
refused for no valid reason except being
stubborn or impossible, then the
guardianship will be withheld by Islamic
law, and will be given to the nearest
male relative of the woman. If the woman
has no male relatives, then the Muslim
Judge will assume the responsibility of
guardianship for that woman and offer
her in marriage to the person who
proposes marriage to her.
Islam
forbids the woman to marry a man who is
not a sound and good match for her in
terms of social status as such a
marriage might bring shame and indignity
to the family. Moreover, a forced
marriage that is not done with the
family?s approval will end up splitting
the family members and cutting
relationships, a matter that Islam does
not condone or promote. Allah the
Almighty, urges Muslims to maintain,
support and strengthen family ties as
much as possible.
Muslims believe that the true
measurement of a matching marriage is
the statement of Allah?s Messenger (PBUH):
If a
person accepts his commitment to Islam
and is of good morals standards proposes
a marriage to you, then grant him the
requested marriage. If you fail to do
so, great affliction will take place on
earth and corruption will be widespreadh93(93)
A man
with a sound and good understanding or
his Islamic commitment, and good moral
standards will honor his wife and
dignify her if he loves her. Such a
person will not humiliate his wife if he
does not feel a true and deep love for
her after marriage.
Islam
forbids a woman (single or married) to
travel alone without the escort of an
immediate unmarriageable relative
companion [Mahram] such as a husband, a
son, a brother, a father, a nephew, an
uncle, etc. Such a relative, other than
the husband, must be one of those whom
she permanently cannot marry due to his
immediate blood relationship to her.
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) said:
A woman
must not travel alone without a male
companion of her immediate relatives to
whom she can never get married [mahram].
Any man must not enter the house of a
woman unless there is a male relative
(Mahram)h94(94)
in the house.? A man stood up and asked
Allah?s Messenger (PBUH), ?O Allah?s
Messenger! My wife set out on a Hajj,
pilgrimage trip, while I have registered
my name to participate in a battle, what
should I do?? Allah?s Messenger (PBUH),
said, ?Go and perform Hajj with your
wifeh95
(95)
Perhaps a person will argue that this
regulation restricts the freedom of the
woman and overrides her rights. This is
what jumps to mind right away. If,
however, we understand the reason behind
it , we may change our opinion. We can
easily remove this misconception about
Islam if we realize that Islam intends
to maintain and preserve the dignity of
the woman and not the opposite.
Traveling, generally, requires many
hardships. Women, by nature, are, at
least physically, weaker than men are,
as we illustrated earlier. This is due
to reasons of pregnancy, menses, child
nursing and childcare. Women are also
weaker psychologically than men. They
are easily inclined to follow
theemotions rather than facts. Women
also are easily affected with
environment and surroundings.
Therefore, a woman is in need for
someone to care for her, protect her and
maintain her needs while traveling.
There are many wicked minded and evil
men around the world who are willing to
take advantage of a weak woman who is
alone or traveling alone. Such
wicked-minded men are either interested
in the wealth of a single woman, her
body and physical attractions, or both.
A woman is an easy target for
wicked-minded men and an easy victim as
well due to her physical and emotional
make-up. A woman is in need for a man to
help her secure all her needs, take care
of her and provide all needed care,
security and attention in order not to
become in need of a stranger, who might
very well take advantage of her needs. A
'Mahram' of a woman in Islam will
fulfill all the needs of a woman, gladly
and with a smile on his face, as this is
a rewarded duty by Allah the Almighty.
A
Mahram therefore is like a sincere,
honest, fully paid servant for a woman,
at no extra charge to her. He is also a
protector, a caretaker and a companion
who will provide her with maximum care,
protection and service. A Mahram will
also provide a protecting shield for a
woman against wicked minded and evil
people who would like to take advantage
of a single woman at any cost.
Who
would think, after all, forbidding a
woman to travel alone, is a humiliating
factor and an insult to her honor,
dignity, pride and intelligence? It is,
in fact, an honor to find a willing man
to serve, protect and give decent moral
and meaningful companionship to a
traveling woman, free of charge.
Allah
the Almighty, stated inthe Glorious
Quran 4:34:
As to
those women on whose part you see
ill-conduct, admonish them (first),
(next), refuse to share their beds, (and
last) beat them (lightly, if it is
useful), but if they return to
obedience, seek not against them means
(of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Most
High, Most Great
Islam,
in fact, forbids beating
h96(96)women
and warns strictly against it. This is
due to the general basic fact that
women, in general, are physically weaker
than men in their physical make-up are.
Women are usually unable to defend
themselves against beating. However,
although beating of women is forbidden,
Islam permitted it in restricted and
very limited occasions and only when it
is required as a final treatment of a
persistent situation, i.e. when a wife
disobeys her husband?s instructions for
no visible and acceptable valid reason.
In the
verse we quoted from the Glorious Quran,
Allah the Almighty dealt with the case
of a wife who disobeys her husband?s
commands and instructions. The treatment
of this extremely sensitive issue comes
on gradual stages, as we have noticed
from the verse. Medicine, or treatment
of any ailment, can be very bitter at
times. But an ill person will take the
remedy gladly and bear the bitterness of
the medicine in order to be cured from
his illness. The remedy to treat a
disobedient wife, as we have noticed,
comes on three gradual stages, as
illustrated by Allah the Almighty in the
Glorious Quran.
First
stage: The stage of advice, counseling
and warning against Allah?s penalty. A
husband must remind his disobedient wife
with the importance of following the
instructions of the husband in Islam.
This stage is a very kind and easy one.
But, if this treatment does not work and
prove not effective, then comes the next
stage.
Second
stage: To leave the wife?s bed. Or, if
one sleeps in the same bed with her, he
will turn his back to her, not touch
her, talk to her and have intercourse
with her. This stage, as noticed,
combines both strictness and kindness,
although it is a very harsh practice on
both. But, if this treatment does not
work, then turn to the final stage of
discipline below.
Third
and final stage: Beating without
hurting, breaking a bone, leaving blue
or black marks on the body and avoiding
hitting the face, at any cost. The
purpose of beating here is a
disciplinary action and not retaliation
or hurting by any means. It is to let
the wife know that her behavior, conduct
and attitude towards her husband are not
acceptable. Beating, in this case, and
according to Islamic teachings, is
restricted and limited to be a form of
treatment only. Beating a wife is not
meant to be a form of humiliation, a
form of forcing and compelling the woman
to do things against her own will, or a
means of hurting her physically. In
fact, it is reported that Ibn ?Abbas (RAA),
one of the leading scholars of early
Muslims, hit only with the (Siwak) the
natural wooden root that is used for
brushing the teeth. Islam forbids severe
beating as punishment. This treatment is
proved to be very effective with two
types of women, as psychologists have
determined:
The
first type: Controlling or mastering
women. These are the type of women who
like to control, master and run the
affairs of their husbands by pushing
them around, commanding them and give
them orders.
The
second type: Submissive, or subdued
women. These women enjoy being beaten.
G. A. Holdfield, a European
psychologist, in his book Psychology and
Morals states the following:
?The
instinct of submission strengthen at
times, in the human being so much that a
submissive person will enjoy seeing
someone overpowering him, over-ruling
him and being cruel to him. Such a
submissive person bears the consequences
of his submission due to the fact that
he enjoys the pain. This is a well
spread instinct amongst women even if
they do not realize it. For this very
reason, women are well known being more
forbearing to pain than men. A wife of
this type of women becomes more
attracted to and admiring of her husband
when he beats her. Nothing, on the other
hand, will sadden some women, such as,
much as a soft, very kind and very
obedient husband who is never upset
regardless of being challenged!?
Beating, in accordance with the Islamic
teachings, is listed as the last and
final stage of training, discipline and
upbringing methods. Islam does not
permit, allow or even condone beating
unless the first two stages are proven
to be ineffective methods of treatment.
Moreover, beating must not be employed
as a remedy if a wife prefers to be
divorced.
Again,
the beating of a wife must be in strict
privacy. A wife must not be beaten
before her children or any one else for
that matter. Beating is considered a
means of discipline and right
upbringing. A father, for instance, may
spank his child for doing something
wrong. A teacher will also spank a
student for doing something wrong, such
as neglecting a homework, being late or
tardy to class or school, cheating on
the test, talking back to the teacher
and so on. Striking here is a means of
upbringing and discipline. That is why
Allah the Almighty illustrated at the
end of the verse that deals with beating
the disobedient wife that:
?But
if they return to obedience, seek not
against them means [of annoyance]....?
Glorious Quran 4:34.
This
assures that the three stages of
discipline stated in the Glorious Quran
are meant only for a good disciplining
cause. Islam does not aim to destroy the
family and causing it to become burdened
with unnecessary pain, headache and
problems. The true destruction of a
family is when the wife becomes a victim
of divorce.
In a
recent statistics in Britain, it was
declared that the number of wives who
have been brutally beaten by their
husbands has risen from 6,400 in 1990 to
30,000 in 1992. This number jumped to
65,400 women in 1995. Statisticians
expect this number to double 124,400
towards the end of the twentieth
century! These statistics, as the report
says, were based on information gathered
from police department. But, what about
the unrepcases of wife-beating, and
women in general, which are not
reported!
Mrs.
Anni Besant stated,
h97(97)while
comparing between Islamic Laws and
Western legislation insofar as women?s
rights are concerned:
?Islamic Laws are among the best laws
known to the world, insofar as woman is
concerned. It is the most fair and just
legislation. It exceeds the Western
legislation concerning real estate,
inheritance and divorce laws. It acts as
a guardian for women?s rights. Phrases
such as ?One Wife is Sufficient for a
man?, and ?Polygamy?, mystified people
and deviated them away from the real
misery which Western women suffer and
live. Many husbands left their wives
after they have got what they wanted
from them. In fact such men show no
care, concern or mercy for their wives.?
Islam
is the eternal divine message of Allah
the Almighty delivered to all men
through Allah?s Messenger (PBUH). A
group of people believed in the Message
of Islam and followed it, while others
disbelieved in it. The Message of Islam
declared at the beginning of the
revelation had endorsed the human beings
as the most dignified and honored among
all other creatures.
Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 17:70:
And
indeed We have honored the children of
Adam, and We have carried them on land
and sea, and have provided them with
lawful good things, and have preferred
them above many of those whom We have
created with a marked preference
Allah
the Almighty also declared another major
principle of man?s life on Earth, after
the first principle was declared.
?All
men are created equal in terms of
original creation.?
Allah
the Almighty stated in the Glorious
Quran 4:1:
O
mankind! Be dutiful to Your Lord, Who
created you from a single person (Adam),
and from him (Adam) He created many men
and women and fear Allah through Whyou
demand your mutual (rights), and (do not
cut the relations of) the wombs
(kinship). , Allah is Ever an All
Watcher over you
Based
on the previous principles, all men are
equal in terms of human values. All men
and women are equal in terms of
expressing their opinion and utilizing
all that has been established on Earth
for them by Their Creator, Allah the
Almighty. All men and women are created
equal in the sight of Allah. If there
are differences between the various
members of mankind, it is truly not on
the basis of honor and lineage. If there
are different levels of people in terms
of living standards, income, etc., this
does not reflect, by any means, a
difference in the human nature of these
classes of people. Distinction between
the levels of mankind is based on their
true commitment to Islam and their level
of practice and application of its
principles in their own lives. Allah the
Almighty, stated this principle in the
Glorious Quran 49:13:
O
Mankind! We have created you from a male
and a female, and made you into nations
and tribes, that you may know one
another. Verily, the most honorable of
you in the Sight of Allah is that who is
most pious and righteous. Verily, Allah
is All-Knowing, All-Aware
Honoring a person, in the Sight of Allah
is not on the basis of color, social
status, sex, race, strength, health,
dignity or wealth. All men are created
equal. The only measure of distinction
and differentiation in the Sight of
Allah the Almighty is strictly on the
basis of piety and performance of good
deeds.
Similarly, Allah?s Messenger (PBUH) was
also reported as saying:
An Arab
has no virtue over a non-Arab. A white
has no virtue over a black except with
the amount of piety
h98(98)
Islamic teachings remove all differences
between men and places them all on equal
footing. One of the essential and
integral teachings of Islam, which is
really misunderstood, misconstrued and
not well explained, is that "a female is
equal to a male in everything except
where there is a clear and distinct call
for exception". These exceptions were
the subject of our booklet. We have
attempted to clarify all these
misconceptions about women that many
people have, including Arabs, Muslims
and non-Muslims, about the reality of
Islam.
Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 9:71:
The
believers, men and women, are helpers,
supporters, friends and protectors of
one another; they enjoin (on the people)
Islamic Monotheism and that Islam orders
one to do, and forbid (people) from all
forms of evil (i.e. polytheism of all
kinds, and all that Islam has forbidden;
they offer their prayers perfectly, and
give their charity and obey Allah and
His Messenger. Allah will shower His
Mercy upon them. Surely Allah is
All-Mighty, All-Wise
Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 3:195:
So their
Lord accepted (their supplication and
answered them), ?Never will I allow to
be lost the work of any one of you, be
he male or female. You are (members) one
of another
Allah
the Almighty, stated in the Glorious
Quran 4:7:
There is
a share for men and a share for women
from what is left by parents and those
closely related, whether, the property
be small or large, a legal share
Based
upon what has been said and elaborated
upon in this entire booklet, one can
comfortably and confidently say that
women never have, and will never ever
enjoy full rights, natural freedom and
complete personal rights except in the
SHADE of ISLAM. Islam has established
and set forth a set of rights for women.
It sets and names certain duties that
she must maintain, be committed to and
perform. All this is due to the fact
that Islam is a divine religion, as
opposed to man-made laws. It is for the
entire mankind, male and female, rich
and poor, king and peasant, healthy and
ill, rich and poor, strong and weak,
white, black, red or yellow. They are
all alike and equal in the Sight of
Their Creator, Allah the Almighty.
Allah, the Creator, knows best what
benefits and improves the situations of
all His creation both in this world and
in the hereafter.
I
would like to request the reader not to
pass judgment on Islam on the basis of
what he/she may see, observe or notice
in the behavior, attitude and
bad-practices of a group of Muslim
individuals who claim close ties to
Islam. In fact, there are some people
who use Islam as a blanket to cover up
their personal crimes, sins and shameful
deeds. Similarly, there are many
individuals who are counted as Muslims,
as they declare by their lips and
tongues that ?There is no deity worthy
of worship but Allah Alone, and Mohammad
(PBUH) is the slave servant, and
Messenger of Allah the Almighty?.
However, these individuals stop at this
point only and do not perform their
Islamic duties, practice their
commitment to Islam in terms of the good
morals that Islam calls for. They may
lie, deceive, cheat, and commit various
kinds of sins and crimes, which are
neither condoned nor accepted by Islam,
of which they claim to be a part.
Islam
is a wholesome religion. It is so vast,
yet simple to apply. There are
individuals who strive throughout their
entire lifetime to be good Muslims, to
attain the best and most perfect level
of practice, seeking the pleasure of
Allah the Almighty, in all that they do.
On the other hand, there are individuals
who have shortcomings, commissions and
omissions which they deserve to be
punished for in this world and in the
hereafter. However, no one can accuse
such sinners and label them ?condemned
and outside the fold of Islam, because
of the sins they have committed.? Such
individuals are called, in accordance
with Islamic teachings and terminology
??Asee?, a sinning disobedient person
who is neglecting the commands of Allah
the Almighty, the instructions and
beautiful teachings of Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH) and the general Islamic
teachings.
For
those who are keen to learn more about
Islam, our advice to them is to seek
knowledge from those who are well-known
fotheir knowledge, understanding and
practice of Islam onto their own lives.
Our advice is ?not to ask a
non-practicing Muslim anything about
Islam.? Such a person, definitely, will
mislead you.
Surface knowledge of Islam is also very
dangerous, harmful and detrimental.
Reading a few books about Islam,
regardless of whether they are reliable
sources or not, will not qualify a
person to pass verdicts and disseminate
sound knowledge about Islam and its
practices. Following the opinions of
others blindly is also very dangerous
and harmful. It isnecessary to seek
unbiased opinions about Islam.
Finally, I request every non-Muslim to
seek correct information about Islam
from reliable sources that are
knowledgeable, God-fearing and well
known as honest Muslim writers. This
book will provide clear and beneficial
knowledge to those who do not know
anything about Islam. For those who
already know something about Islam, it
can only increase their knowledge and
Islamic education. Allah the Almighty,
stated in the Glorious Quran 2:256:
There is
no compulsion in religion. Verily, the
Right Path has become distinct from the
wrong path. Whoever disbelieves in the
?Taghut? (anything worshipped other than
Allah and believes in Allah, then he has
grasped the trustworthiest handhold that
will never break. Allah is the
All-Hearer, All-Knowing
1-
This Hadith is reported by Imam Bukhari.
(back)
2-
Ghalayenee, A Word about Women, he
quoted from Schopenhauer book Islam, the
Spirit of Civilization, page 224.(back)
3-
Abdullah bin Wokayil Al-Shaikh, in his
book The Woman and the Enemies? Plot.(back)
4-Shaikh
Mitwalli Al-Shi?rawee, in his book Fate
and Predestiny
(back)
5-This
Hadith is reported by Ibn ?Asaker.
(back)
6-Reported
by al-Hakim al-Naisaburi.
(back)
7-
Glorious Quran 16:58-59.
(back)
8-
See Pre-Islamic Religious Books, Pages
168-169, by Ali Abdulwahid Wafi. See
further Woman In Islam and International
Laws, Page 14, by Salim Bahnasi, Dar al-Kalam,
Kuwait, 1986.
(back)
9-
What Has the World Lost
in Muslim Degeneration, Pages 60-61, by
N, quoting ?the Great Indian Battle? of
the story of Baharat.
(back)
10-
The Story of Civilization, Voluntary.3,
pages 178, 180, 181, by W. Durant.
Translated by: Mohammed Badran.
(back)
11-
See Comparative Religions, Part-3, Page
208 by Dr Ahmad Shalabi. See also Arab
civilization by G. Lebon Pages 406-408,
translated by Zuaiter. You may further
refer to The Story of Civilization,
Part-3, Pages 177-178 and 180-181 by W.
Durant, translation of Muhammad Badran.
(back)
12-
Dr. Mostafa Al-Siba?iee, in his book
?Woman between Jurisprudence and Law?.
(back)
13-
Manna is a very strange personality,
which has been surrounded with a lot of
mystery in the Hindus culture. Some
classify Manna as a god above people
while other Hindu books classify him as
the grandfather of their people.
(back)
14-
Ahmad Abdul Azeez Al-Hosaiyin Woman and
her Position in Islam.
(back)
15-
Abbas Mahmoud Al-?Akkad, Woman in the
Glorious Quran.
(back)
16-
See Women In Islam page 183 by Dr Samia
Munaisi, quoting the last report of the
International Seminar on Illiteracy on 1
December 1990, by UNESCO, entitled Islam
and Woman Education by Nakib Exor Nicole
Page 44 (ED/91/WS/22).
(back)
17-
What Has the World Lost in Muslim
Degeneration, Pages 60-61, By Nadawi,
quoting R.C.Dutt. 331.
(back)
18-
See Arab Civilization
Page 406 by Dr G. Lebon, Translation of
Zuaiter.
(back)
19-
The Story of Civilization, by W. Durant,
Vol. 9, pages 118, 119 and 120.
Translated by Mohammed Badran.
(back)
20-Comparative
Religions page 188, Part 3, by Dr Ahmad
Shalabi. Also, Arab Civilization, Page
408. Rendered into Arabic by Adel
Zuaiter. Al-Halabi Press - Egypt.
(back)
21-
Arab Civilization, by Dr. G. Lebon,
translated by Zuaiter, page 408.
(back)
22-
Ibid., page 208, Part 3.
(back)
23-
The Story of Civilization, by W. Durant,
Vol. 7, pages 117 and 118. Translated by
Mohammed Badran.
(back)
24-Arab
Civilization, Page 406. Rendered into
Arabic by Adel Zuaiter. Al-Halabi Press
- Egypt.
(back)
25-
Husain Al-Shaikh, Studies in the Greek
and Romans Civilization, Page 149.
(back)
26-
Shawqee Abu-Khaleel, Islam in the
Accusation Cage.
(back)
27-
This Hadith is reported by Ahmad, Abu
Dawood and Baihaqee.
(back)
28-
This Hadith is reported by Imam Malik in
his book Al-Mouwatta.
(back)
29-
This Hadith is reported by Baihaqee.
(back)
30-
This Hadith was reported
by Abu Dawood and Tirmithee.
(back)
31-
This Hadith was reported by Ahmad.
(back)
32-
This Hadith was reported
by Abu Dawood and Nasaiee.
(back)
33-
This Hadith was reported
by both Bukhari and Muslim.
(back)
34-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
35-
This Hadith was reported by Muslim.
(back)
36-
This Hadith was reported by both Bukhari
and Muslim.
(back)
37-
This Hadith is reported by Al-Bazzar.
(back)
38-
This Hadith was reported
by Nasaiee.
(back)
39-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
40-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari.
(back)
41-
This Hadith was reported by Ahmad. The
wording of the Hadith, however, is
somewhat different as quoted herein.
(back)
42-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari.
(back)
43-
This Hadith was reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
44-
Ibid.
(back)
45-
This Hadith was reported by Imam Ahmad
(RAA).
(back)
46-
This Hadith was reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
47-
This Hadith was reported by Ibn-Hibban
and Abu-Dawood.
(back)
48-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
49-This
Hadith is reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
50-
This Hadith was reported
by Muslim.
(back)
51-
This Hadith was reported
by Bukhari.
(back)
52-
Peace Treaty of Hodaibiyeh, a well-known
place in the outskirts of Makkah where
Allah?s Messenger
(PBUH), concluded
a peace treaty with the pagans of Makkah
in the 8th year of Hijrah.
(back)
53-This
Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
54-This
Hadith was reported by Muslim.
(back)
55-
This Hadith was reported
by Al-Nasaiee and Ibn Majah as follows:
?A man came to the Prophet
(PBUH),
and said: ?O Prophet of Allah! I intend
to participate in the Islamic fighting
for the cause of Allah. I came to
consult you about it. The prophet
(PBUH)
asked the man ?Do you have a (living)
mother? The man said Yes. He
(PBUH)
said, ?Do not depart her sight. Paradise
is by her feet.?
(back)
56-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
57-
This Hadith was reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
58-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari.
(back)
59-
This Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
60-
This Hadith was reported by both Bukhari
and Muslim.
(back)
61-This
Hadith was reported by Bukhari.
(back)
62-This
Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
63-This
Hadith was reported by al-Hakim.
(back)
64-This
Hadith was reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
65-This
Hadith was reported by both Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
66-This
Hadith was reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
67-This
Hadith was reported by both Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
68-This
Hadith was reported by both Abu Dawood
and Ibn Majah.
(back)
69-This
Hadith was reported by both Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
70-This
Hadith was reported by Al-Tirmithee and
Abu Dawood.
(back)
71-This
Hadith was reported by both Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
72-This
Hadith was reported by both Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
73-?The
Old Testament and the New Testament?,
published by American Old Testament
Society, and the British Old Testament
Society, Cairo, 1938.
(back)
74-Western
Mark, (History of Marriage), rendered
into Arabic by Abdul Hameed Al-Yunis.
(back)
75-Abbas
M. Al-?Akkad, Woman in the Glorious
Quran.
(back)
76-This
Hadith was reported by Abu-Dawood.
(back)
77-This
Hadith was reported by Tirmithee.
(back)
78-This
Hadith was reported by Abu Dawood,
al-Nasaiee, Al-Tirmithee and Ibn Majah.
(back)
79-Al-Azhar
University Magazine, Vol.8, page 291.
(back)
80-Ahmad
Abdul Aziz Al-Hussein, Woman and her
Position in Islam.
(back)
81-Ibid.
(back)
82-Waheed-ud-Deen
Khan, Islam Challenges.
(back)
83-Woman
in the Glorious Quran.
(back)
84-Waheed-du-Deen
Khan, Islam Challenges, page 168.
(back)
85-Abdur
Rahman Wasil, Youth Sexual and Emotional
Problems under the Lights of the Islamic
Jurisprudence, Dar-ul-Shorooq, 1406 H.
(back)
86-Mostafa
Al-Ghalayenee A Look at Women Purdah,
published in Beirut, 1346 H., pages
94-5.
(back)
87-bin
Wokaiyel Al-Shaikh, Woman?s Work on the
Scale.
(back)
88-This
Hadith is reported by Abu Dawood and
Al-Hakim.
(back)
89-This
Hadith is reported Al-Tabaranee. The
wording of this Hadith, however, is
?Allah dislikes those who marry woman
just to taste how they feel like...?
(back)
90-This
Hadith is reported by Ahmad, Abu Dawood
and Al-Tirmithee.
(back)
91-This
Hadith is reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
92-This
Hadith is reported by Bukhari,
Abu-Dawood, Ibn Majah, Al-Nasaiee and
Al-Tirmithee.
(back)
93-This
Hadith is reported by Tirmithee. Failing
to honor the request of a person with
good faith, practices, morals and
character to marry, upon his request,
may lead to moral corruption in the
society and the community. Such a person
may deviate from the clean and normal
path of preserved and respected family
practices and may go astray seeking to
fulfill his sexual desires by unlawful
means. This is what the general meaning
of the Hadith of Allah's Messenger e
means.
(back)
94-?Mahram?
is a male-relative of a woman who can
see her in private, stay and travel with
her, due to marital relation, if he is a
husband, a father in-law, or a son
in-law, or he is blood related to her
and cannot marry her such as a father, a
son, an uncle from either side, a
grandfather from both sides, or a
grandson or a nephew.
(back)
95-This
Hadith is reported by Bukhari and
Muslim.
(back)
96-Al-Usrah
[Family] Magazine, Jumada I, 1416 H.
(back)
97-The
Life and Teachings of Mohammed Madras,
1932.
(back)
98-This
Hadith was reported by Ahmad.
(back)